I'm "really" enjoying this festive season.. *hicks*..
Guys.. check out this website ----> http://www.themeatrix.com/!!
[The owner of this blog is currently taking an extended vacation due to the festive season.. he willl be returning in mid feb.. Do watch out for the massive changes to this blog.. coming soon..]
Something that i should be learning to do.. but i'm not..
Cast all your fears and anxieties to jesus..
Well, everytime i am feeling depressed.. everytime i am feeling down.. everytime complex emotions flood my mind, i will have this compulsion to blog it down.. i mean, its not as if i keep all my thoughts and feelings bottled up till they explode, but what i am currently doing to help release my emotions is just as bad..
Everytime something happens to me that affects my life in a great way, i will be tempted to blog it down, and vomit out all of my anger and hatred to my personal space.. this shouldn't be right.. but i am a very expressive person.. and if i don't find ppl to share my feelings, i may just go insane..thats why my blog is like my saving grace..where i can let the ppl know how i really fell deep down inside.. and what i am going through..
Well, a few ppl have asked me to turn to Jesus when i have any troubles or worries and to pray to him for help.. I am seriously considering their advice.. but its the way i share my life in my blog that makes my blog unique.. and if i don't share about my life in this way anymore, my blog will be just like those other blogs out there.. other blogs that just summarize their activities for the day.. Blogs that do not go about expressign the persons deepest thoughts.. Blogs that do not enable the reader's to gain insights over the bloggers life.. I do not wish that to happen..
Now playing Cascada- Everytime we touch
Sneak Lyrics:
"I need a miracle
I wanna be your girl
Give me a chance to see
That you are made for me
I need a miracle
Please let me be your girl
One day you'll see it can happen to me
I need a miracle
I wanna be your girl
Give me a chance to see
That you are made for me
I need a miracle
Please let me be your girl
One day you'll see it can happen to me
It can happen to me"
Yesterday, i sat down at the dinner table to eat with my dad.. Well, after he finished eating, he was lost in thought and kept staring blankly into space.. i have never seen him daydreaming before in my life.. but, yesterday, for the first time ever, i saw him stoning away.. i asked "dad, are u ok?" and well, he responded by shaking his head slightly and looking awya in another direction..
i could see from the look in his eyes that he wasn't really happy with his new job.. i guessed he missed Sp a lot.. and, this made me very sad..
As i was preparing to sleep, thoughts kept flooding my mind over the events that happened.. I kept thinking of how the new director of SMA indirectly helped ruin my family, and how he could have done much more as a christian if he had stayed as the director of SAA.. I knew that as the director of SAA, he could have easily approved more fundings or liberty to the Christian cca's in Sp to organise more club and outreach activities.. he definitely could have helped fufill the great comission in a much greater way..
I mean, he was already receiving directors pay(which is alot) before he backstabbed my dad as director of SMA.. What more could he have wanted?? The answer was obvious.. His actions were driven by pure greed..the greediness for more fame glory and publicity.. There was no other explanation for it.. He just wanted more glory to add to his name..
I kept thinking of whether he knew the importance of the great comission but i just shut my eyes and told myself not to think too much.. the events that had happened were just too painful to think abt.. i slept quite peacefully that night..
Now playing Daft Punk - One More Time
Sneak Lyrics:
"One more time...
One more time
We gonna celebrate
Oh yeah, all right
Don't stop dancing
One more time
We gonna celebrate
Oh yeah, all right
Don't stop dancing
One more time
We gonna celebrate
Oh yeah, all right
Don't stop dancing
One more time
We gonna celebrate
Oh yeah...
One more time"
Yesterday as i was preparing to go for CLM, i was walking past the auditorium nxt to the Sp convention centre and my blood boiled.. Right at the foot of the auditorium was a display of the SMA'S (Singapore Maritime Acadamy's) achievements since it started off in Sp.. I was like.. PLEASE LORX!! Without my dad helping the SMA last time, SMA wouldn't have been what it is today!!
Ok, i went to put my stuff at the CLM room before rushing back to the SMA display area..I was like so ready to stand off with the Sp principal or the new SMA director should i see them.. I was like so determined to defend my dad's reputation..
Ok, apart from some SMA students and a few "V.I.PS", i didn't see any trace of the 2 most wanted..Well, i went to scan through all the displays and my BLOOD BOILED EVEN MORE.. I saw the Sp principal's face in a lot of pictures shaking hands with vip's and signing agreements.. I kept looking at that retarded smile he was giving and i can tell you.. at those intense moments, i wanted very badly to KILL him.. i wassn't thinking straight..honest.. and my mind was a huge mess.. emotions kept flooding in and broke down into tears..
Well, my dad's abscence from Sp has somehow contributed to a sharp rise in family problems back home.. Now that he is in a job in the private sector, he keeps coming home later than his previous job as asst. director.. Now, insteads of the usual 10-11 , he is coming home at ard 11-12.. At times. it can be even later.. Well, he now has many many business appointments overseas and he is always constantly on the move.. Well, when he comes home, he will usually be too tired to help the family...
My mum is getting very frustrated over my dad's abscene and well, last sunday, she had a quarrel with my dad and well, she is now challenging my dad to a divorce.. She even asked me which side i would take should they divorce.. She's very serious and i was like so shocked.. I just kept saying "No" to my mum.. Also, my dad's paitience and temper has become very short..
Well, my mum and dad have been quarelling since i was in nursery and i rmb that once their argument was so hot that my mum just packed her bags and left for overseas.. (that was when i was in pri 1 and staying at the Sp staff apartments.)
So it's like, even though many ppl have told me to count myself blessed to be in such a well off family, i kept begging to differ..All the money in the world couldn't buy me what i needed most.. the love and care of my parents and spending quality time with them.. Who cares if i get more pocket money or if i get more material items.. CRAP IT.. If my house is always constantly a huge war zone, then whats the point..
My brother (sec 2) is also turning bad and well, i think he is close to joining a gang.. The worse thing is, my parent sthink that they understand my younger brother truely, when they don't.. In fact, i'm the one who understands my younger brother..
Pride is destroying my family to pieces.. this stronghold in my family has always exsisted and well, both of my parents just refuse to admit that they arwe wrong in certain ways and they just keep driving to the other party the msg that they are always correct and that they know whats best for the other.. they just keep trying to keep this up during their quarrels but it just doesn't work.. Both of my parents are filled with so much pride that it also makes it SO HARD for me to reach out to them.. they always feel that since they have successful lives and i don't, i shouldn't be telling them how to lead theirs with some Christian way.. Frankly speaking, my parens always say that experiences actually shape the way you wwant to live your life.. I know that they have seen alot of things and have been over exposed to the darker-side of Christianity.. Take the new director of SMA for example.. When he stepped in as Director thru some political connections, he JUST WASN'T THINKING!! I mean, he didn't pay the price for his actions, BUT MY DAD DID!! My dad has now become so disillusioned with Christianity that i just can't get anything into him and i am so afriad that his soul will be lost.. And the worse thing was, thee new director of SMA is a staunch Christian!! Doesn't he know that what he has done has indirectly help erase the attendance of another soul in heaven?? Does he know what he is doing?? Isn't he being selfish??
Well, i've said so much.. but, i still believe that God is in control over my family and that prayer will change things.. So this to all Christians.. As you read thru this posting.. i want you ppl to pray for my family.. that we will see the softening of the hearts of my family and that God will use me to share the Gospel once agin to them, that they will believe once more and be saved.. Pray that the stronghold of pride will not be a stumbling block in communication in my family and that we will be a loving family to the very end.. Also, pray that everyone of us will not bottle up our feelings and that averyone of us will have good time management and my dad can effectively prioritise family time at home.. God bless you all..
Now playng DaddyDJ - Daddy DJ
Sneak Lyrics:
"Daddy DJ, please take me to the party
And let me dance along, until the lights are on
Daddy DJ, please take me to the party
And let the music play, until the break of day "
Average@Internet-User.com (41% - 60%) Now playing: Baracuda - I leave the World today Sneak Lyrics: "The winters told me everything but I am on my way, I don't need no more diamond rings, I leave the world today. But you can tell a thousand lies to think that I would stay, cause I am not a fool for you, I leave the world today..." Are you Addicted to the Internet? 45%
You seem to have a healthy balance in your life when it comes to the internet and life away from the computer. You know enough to do what you want online without looking like an idiot (most of the time). You even have your own Yahoo club or online journal! But you enjoy seeing your friends and going out to enjoy life away from your computer.
Alrite.. really pissed with my bro.. Well, apparently his addiction for maple story has taken new bounds.. When i told him nicely to leave the comp coz i needed to do my IT assignments, he just refused.. Kept giving me that stuck up attitude and kept refusing to give up the comp!! Always complaining with "what other time do i have to play?".. Kana sai!! Hey!! Listen up bugger!! My entire course has got to do with computers and i dun wanna hear this shit from you abt playing the comp.. U can juz SHUT THE CRAP UP and throw away ur maple accnt!! Oh crap.. its ruining ur life..
Imean, who is so addicted to maple to play it from 8.00pm to 7.00 am the nxt day!! ITS SIBEI SIAO!!
Alright, my bro has got some serious issues.. Just yesterday i checked thru his hp msg inbox and found out ot my horror that all those times he has been telling my parents that he has been gg to do projects with his friends weren't true!!
CRAP!! U know where he go or not?? He make friends in maple and arranged to meet up with them in lan shops in places like taman jurong and lakeside just too trade Maple Credits for cash!! WAH LIAO EHX!! Somemore those ppl are strangers siah!! Worse still horx, is my dad fetch him by car to these places thinking that he has was gg to do projects with his friends.. #&$#&$#$%$#!!! One of these days i gg to get my bro for this..
Edited: My bro pretended to be sick this morning just so tht he dun nid to go sch.. Worse thing was, his acting was so FAKE.. pretend to cough also dunno how to do.. when i was still in my bed, i was like.. -----> -.-" .. Somemore, my dad actually believed himl, go and give him money to see doctor.. WAH LIAO EHX.. What is this world coming to!! Then, when my dad left for work, , i was preparing to go to sch when my bro just jumped out of his bed and said "How was my acting?" #$#$%@%#%&@%!!! Hey bugger.. i know u want to play maple story right? But dun have to go to such an exent yeah?? Hid all the power cords from both comps at home.. But it still didn't stop him.. (At 1.00pm , my bro went off to cyber active (West Mall) to buy another one.. )
Now playing: The Corbans - Strength
Full Lyrics:
"Dear friends take comfort
In the joy you receive
To those still searching
For a truth to believe
I know a hope that saves
The weak and the lost
A man that saves
By the wood of a cross
I am not afraid to say
I live for Christ
His name will separate
The men from the mice
Be bold, Be strong
In the praise from your lips
These words are everything
You don't want to miss
Stand up and shout it
If you know how I feel
This song of strength
Makes me feel so unreal
To the Lord alone
Our praises we sing
I'm proud to admit
That I feel like a king
That I feel like a king
I hope the Spirit finds you
Strong in the faith
To those still searching
For the path of the saints
Your sin can vanish
From the depth of your souls
Redemption is found
In the blood of the Lord
In the blood of the Lord"
Alright..doing some late night blogging.. (well actually it should be considered early morning blogging coz its 13 mins past 12.00..)
Hmm.. suddenly as i was gg through all my cellgrp's blogs.. i just realised that not many ppl actually had the discipline to blog and keep their postings updated.. which means -----> my blog is so special!! wahahah!! LOLX.. not that i want to be proud or anything..
Also i realsied that my blog is one of those "controversial" blogs being viewed ard my church peeps.. Well, the catch is ------> I have NVR told any church member my blog add!! But, the thing is... some "secret source" found my blog add, and now its been circulating ard the church like crazy!! (if i find that "secret source" .. not sure if i will scold that person or just forgive him/her..)
Just recently, i found out that the most unlikely ppl in church to view my blog have viewed my blog!! OH MY GOSH!! I mean if ppl who knew me in church read my blog, (like those bb or gb members or maybe even the church pastors or the church workers) i still can tolerate.. but then, suddenly.. its like everybody who views my blog thinks they know what i am gg thru and then starts to give opinions.. comments.. advice.. encouragement.. etc.. and i am like.. -.-"
Do u guys know me well?? I know u ppl may betrying to help or sth but PLS LORX!! Reading my blog is and commenting abt my postings is not the way!!
Alrite.. i also found out that i have been irregular with following up with my postings.. like.. i did write abt certain problems i am facign in my life but when i had solved it, i didn't blog it down.. so, it caused a lot of misunderstanding as well.. my bad..
So, Alrite.. just wanna clarify a few things...
1. I am now back in the body of christ.. in cosbt and in aspiration.. (my new cel...l) I now know the reason for believing and i can tell you that if it was not for the Singapore Polytechnic Campus Crusade For Christ, i would have still been living that miserable and empty life.. (Spccc can be good ok!!)
2. I have learnt how to deal with BGR'S.. God has already arranged a special someone for each of us in our lives.. And well, we just need to follow god's plan and that god will show us who that special someone is..
Well, if u experience strong feelings for a certain person, it may not be the person god wants you to be with.. Remember that you may just be experiencing infatuation.. (dunno pls go and check the dictionary..)
Also... note to all christians.. christians having bgr's with non-chrstians is wrong!! It creates lots of problems and may also undermine ur faith in the process..
Well, also, if u feel strongly that a person is ur special someone, pls pray to god and ask first.. Do quiet time and ask god to speak to you if its true.. Ok, dun anyhow have bgr's as if its a play thing.. Ok.. even though the world treats bgr's like a play thing, we are not to follow this world..
Lastly.. pls go and read the bible on what love is defined as.. i lazy to find the bible chpt but all you chrstians should know what i mean..
3. I am currently growing in faith in many areas and i am not living for this world.. (as some of you church ppl might suggest) i know that you guys may think that having bling or having long hair dyed hair might give bad impressions to others.. But pls take note that the bible said that we should not follow the ACTIONS of this world.. The dye hair long hair etc thing is just our own personal preference!! its our own personal tastes!! Ok!! (Just like applying make up..) God created us all to be different and u dun expect everyone to sport a a buzz cut.. (A lot of us won't look nice with a buzz cut..)
And well, another thing i want to add is that if u ppl see any christian trying to act like others.. pls take note that it may not because they want to fit in desperately with others.. they may just actually want to make themselves part of the crowd so that they can reach out to them.. I know that some pastors actually go to pubs to drink beer with others with the purpose of reaching out to them.. BUT.. it does not mean that they are drunkards or anything!! When they drink beer, they are still loving god!! Jesus also drank wine with the tax-collectors to reach out to them ok!!
And well,remember the 2 greatest commandments we christians need to follow?!?!
1.Love the lord your god with all your heart..
2.Love thy neighbour as yourself..
So it does not mean that if christians start to follow others.. we are like starting to be like the world.. RUBBISH!! If we still love god and are working towards fufilling the great comission, there's no point stopping us!!
Yesterday morning i couldn't help out with my campus crusade surveys as i had to do lots of my projects.. Well, i left house early in the afternoon to head for cell.. went past westmall to take bus 852 at the interchange.. Well, as i was walking to the traffic light that is btwn the interchange and the mrt station, i saw 2 gilrs in sch uniforms trying to get donations.. Well, if i'm not wrong, i *tink* they were hillgrovians coz if i not wrong i saw them wearing green uniform.. Well, i looked at them and i was considering donating.. Well, i decided not to as i was apprroaching the traffic light as i was too lazy mahx.. Erm.. i think the 2 girls read my mind as they kept on whispering and pointing at me after i turned my head away and then suddenly, one of the girls rushed up to me and said.. "Gor Gor.. Ke yi bang wo men juan qian mah?" in the sweetest voice possible.. Then i was like.. er... er..er.. I was a sucker for such requests siah and i just took out a coin from my hand and dropped it into her tin can.. *shakes head and sighs*
Hmm.. that sheltered stretch leading to the bkt batok bus interchange is known to me as a "rip off" area.. Why ah? Coz everytime you can always find street buskers, old aunties selling tissues, the occasional disabled person asking for money, street vendors selling fruits and chesnuts and the usual men's magazines , or even ppl selling curry puffs in the most unsanitary conditions..
Well, met a poly course mate along the way to the bus.. said hi..
Hmm.. today (sunday) i went to see the doctor again.. well the doc said that if i haven't fully recovered in 5 days i should go back and see the doctor again.. the queue was so long again!! Much longer!! My queue number was 28 but the paitient seeing the doctor was 18!! Arrggghh!! Slept most of the time in the clinic.. read a few boring magazines.. until finally it was my turn to see the doctor.. (got more antibiotics..)
Next, went to westmall to exchange a few t-shirts plus buy a new pair of jeans.. then went to exchange some money at the money changer in westmall.. Well, breadtalk, which was opposite the money changer, was playing techno.. usually it didn't play any music but this time, it did.. And, the techno was HORRIBLE!! I should know best as i have been collecting techno for so long!! It was just another one of those techno songs trying to be hard and heavy but it turns out it wasn't as distinct as other crowd favourites.. juz seemed to be as "ANOTHER LAME TECHNO SONG"... No lyrics somemore.. aiyoz..
Ok, went to IMM nxt.. but as i was gg to IMM, i saw this saloon driving past.. and well er.. they had car stickons that kept saying things like we love god or jesus saves.. Ok.. the only other vehicle that i have seen so far with a more prominent christian msg was the church van.. On the church van got some huge red words on the left saying JESUS LOVES YOU.. alright.. i mean that van is always either in my sec sch compound or the church building.. So, i guess its rather safe.. But then the saloon is like dangerous siah!! I mean, the family inside also have small kids lehx!! And then, driving ur car and parking it all ard Singapore is only finding trouble with others.. Sorry ah.. not that i want to criticise u ppl for putting up such stickers.. but what if scully u ppl park ur car in some shopping centre and then come back to find all the windscreens smashed to pieces.. or worse still, ur car gets burned down to the ground?? Hah.. this made me think of what if that saloon was in another country that opposes christianity.. Hah.. if that car was in Indonesia or maybe even Norway right now, the car insurance confirm good game liao lorx.. The car is like a walking advetisement saying -----> "Please damage my car.. Have fun!! =)" LOLX.. Alright, in IMM i bought more jeans in an even cheaper sale.. bought a few pairs of shirts.. had my hair ----> "trimmed".. The hairstylist was quite good.. she knew my tastes completely..At first, i was cursing that i couldn't get the male hairstylist to trim my hair.. coz its according to the queue wadz.. (Male hairstylists usually understand my hair btr than females..) But in the end, i was so happy!! =)
Hah.. what is the world coming too.. good hairstylists i also feel so happy..
Alright.. went home nxt.. still have new shoes to buy..
I'm not really sure if i hsould get sport shoes or just sneakers... But, i still have 80 dollars and i guess the shoes will have to wait.. i'm just too busy to get them.. i'll just have to drop by queensway shopping centre sometime soon bah..
Now playing: Daniel Bedingfield - If you're not the one
Sneak Lyrics:
"I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms"
Poly open house was from thursday to saturday, and almost the entire crusade was mobilised to help out with its recruitment exercise.. the reason why we were so desperate this year was because all the poly-enrollments for Sp this year will be done online. So, we went around giving out surveys to all the post-secondary students..
The surveys are quite simple lah! Like.. what course do you wish to take in Sp or would you wish to come if we organise activities fro you in march.. then also got another question that says.. did u know that sp is the top poly to offer a game designing diploma? Er.. i mean.. my course IT 3rd yr students got a choice to do game design.. But i can tell u, its impossible to get in!! Out of maybe 200+ places in IT, only 20 places are reserved for it!! And only the best of the best programmers in our IT course enter it!! out surveys to all the post-secondary students..
Well, theres a seperate course called game design though.. But the problem is, how many ppl are gg to enter the course to expeirnece game design before regretting it.. Game design is ALL abt programming siah.. A lot of gaming freaks juz dun seem to realise tht.. Juz keep patronising all those lan shops and gaming arcades with all their parents hard earned money..
Alright, we were banking very much on the last question in the survey, just below the particulars section.. And that was.. what religion are you? Well, that was the most impt..
Hmm.. on friday i got the shock of my life.. Well, 2 shocks actually.. On thursday i realised that i haven't submitted my mc for tuesday to the admin office.. So at night i searched the whole house like siao, only to realise that the mc was in a small plastic bag which my mum threw away.. SHIT.. Ok, i went to the clinic to ask for another one, but they said they could only write a letter instead.. So, i was like ok.. just wite one siah.. But the doc was too busy and so i was asked to come back at ard 10..Came back tht time but the doc was still busy, so i was told to come back on fri morning.. Well, i went to sch first, before skipping alessonwhich was on frm 10 to 12 to rush back to get the letter.. Than, i rushed back for my gems lessons at 1 before heading back to the biz blk to submit my mc.. But when i went into the admin office, they said that mc's that are past 48hrs cannot be submitted!! Arrgghhh!!!
Alright.. the 2nd shock.. i had this classmate from sec sch who is now studying in Sp also.. Well, he grew very long permed hair in poly (up till his shoulders) and even had it dyed brown.. Well, on friday, he shocked me at the dover mrt busstop when he spotted an almost clean shaven haircut!! I was like ----> OH MY GOSH!! And , he was wearing my sec sch pe t-shirt and also my sec sch long pants!! THis made me wonder if he wanted to go for the open house looking like a sec sch student again.. -.-" I mean, if he wanted the open house freebies (i'm not saying thats why he cut his hair) he shouldn't have gone to such an extent..
Hmm.. well, had my gen12 ii teammeeting on friday evening.. We were all given our team newsletters.. Well, we are to go ask ard for support.. I'm currently doing so.. =)
Now playing: Casting Crowns - Praise you in this storm
Sneak lyrics:
"And i'll praise you in this storm
and i will lift my hands
that you are who you are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
you hold in your hand
you never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise you in this storm"
Artist: RoccoTitle: Generation Of Love (Single Version)
We are the generation of love,
This is the time for higher emotion,
We are the generation of love,
This is the night for love devotion,
We are the generation of love,
This is the time for higher emotion,
We are the generation of love,
This is the night for love devotion,
For love devotion.
Come and dance. (x2)
Bad, bad boy.
Na-na-na-naaa-na-na,
Na-na-na-naa-naa-naa-na-na-na,
Na-na-na-naaa-na-na,
Na-na-na-naa-naa-naa-na-na-na,
We are the generation of love,
This is the time for higher emotion,
We are the generation of love,
This is the night for love devotion,
For love devotion.
We are the generation of love,
This is the time for higher emotion,
We are the generation of love,
This is the night for love devotion,
For love devotion.
Na-na-na-naaa-na-na,
Na-na-na-naa-naa-naa-na-na-na,
Na-na-na-naaa-na-na,
Na-na-na-naa-naa-naa-na-na-na.
Well, i guess so..
Now playing: Groove Coverage - Runaway
Sneak Lyrics:
"I wannna know the strength of your heart
why did you tell my broken soul and heart
is it a dream or mayority
loved and without after warranty"
Today i got owned.. losing my voice fast..
Well, i got advice form some ppl that i should fast and pray to god bout deliverance from temptation.. But the thing is.. i am sick!! I need food or else i can't take my medicine!!
If i don't blog my emotions down, i think they will just keep bottling up and i might explode one day.. well, i know i'm just a friend, and well, i know i'll probably never express my feelings.. i'll just leave it this way then.. i know i will most probably face the "wrath" of a few seniors should i do otherwise.. But, the main reason is that i need to concentrate on spreading god's message..there's just no time for anything else.. But some part of me always seems to rebel with what is supposed to be right..
Some part of me just screams out that i am doing injustice to myself.. that others can choose to accept bgr's while i have no choice but to reject it.. Well, those "others" always seemed to me as never at fault..whatever they do just seems to be so right.. I just wonder if they have they ever stopped to listen to other ppl's views over their lives!! Why issit that when they (or other ppl) comment abt me, its just so easy and the whole world just doesn't seem to care.. When they hurt me in certain ways, all they need to do is just apologise insincerely and they are free to get on with their lives.. But when i hurt them, or when i try to have my own opinions, the world suddenly turns against me.. And why issit that they are allowed to do certain things but i can't.. I mean everyone keeps saying to have big dreams.. but my dreams are just supressed coz ppl always have this negative view that i am not ready..thats judging me right?? its just sibei unfair!!
I mean, its almost as if they can do certain things that are controversial, but i can't coz i am not "mature enough" or sth.. and when they make lots of mistakes, everybody is so quick to forgive them, but if i made the same mistakes, its just prove that i am not fit to do those controversial things.. Why so prejudice siah!! Why so stuck up!! Why so unforgiving!! ( Hey i can be a bit exaggerative at times causing alarm to ppl reading my blog.. a word of advice ---> "chill"..) When i talk about controversial things, i mean things such as voicing views on others, bgr, etc..
[Hmm.. some ppl who read this post have asked if i am angry over leadership.. well, nope.. haha just angry over a few stuck up ppl.. must learn to forgive them though.. =P]
Sure.. i will get over this.. its just a matter of time..
i know that there's some sacrifices involved..
Oh man.. i seem to be giving a lot of ppl the wrong msgs everytime they read my blog.. haha.. so lets clarify things..
1. Sometimes i am not as angst filled as my postings suggest.. i just like to be a bit overly dramatic..
2. More often than not, these postings are just for my own personal reference and i when i write them i know a lot of ppl will not understand.. so pls dun anyhow comment.. ask me first..
3. My postings do not need to make any sense.. i mean this is not a commercial publication where everything must mean sth to the reader..
4. You may not understand me better thru my postings.. coz i may be happy right now, but in my blog u may think i'm not.. =P
5. Blogging to me is like a form of release of stress.. so hmm..
6. I'm starting to write a lot of nonsense.. forgive me if i do so.. too stressed lately.. and its like if i can't even have freedom over what i post in my blog, then siao liao lah!! Next moment ppl will be reading my mind.. =P
Now playing: piece of heaven - akira
Sneak Lyrics:
"The minute you walked through my door
I know this love is forever more
But then you told my all these lies
See the tears filling up my eyes"
Went to the crusade room soon after to take my cough medicine.. Well, stayed dere for a while before deciding to head back to the buisness blk.. Well, the rest of the events up till the time i came home i shall not say.. I just want to say that i feel its hopeless to have a relationship.. I just wanna torture myself until the feeling passes.. and i can tell you, its very painful.. (do look for clues in my blog..) Now playing: DJ digress - Follow up Sneak Lyrics: "This is the f... (x 5) This is the (x 7) This is the follow up (follow up) This is the f... (x 6) This is the follow up"Well, woke up feeling quite faint today, and i wanted very much just to stay in bed.. but the thought of finally seeing her school just made me wanna go to sch a.s.a.p..
i mean..this is crazy.. i never wanted to have such emotions.. but now that i have them, shit.. i just can't get them out of my head..
Alright.. i wasn't fit to go to school.. but i just wanted to see her.. (actually main reason was to go for clm lah..) i mean, this is so weird and crazy.. Why can't i just wish this emotions out of me?
Well, my classmates, most of them were wondering why i went to school when i should have been staying at home resting.. i didn't tell them why.. but my eyes kept looking around and searching..
Well, when finally it was time for my lunch break at a certain foodcourt, i kept seeing her.. and i can tell you, i was like arrgghh!! Just don't let me have any mixed emotions lah!!
Alright.. after the lunch break i went for class.. but i told the cher that i wasn't feeling so well and i wanted to go home.. Also, she was taking my cd class later in the day and my grp had not come out with any slides for presenting our project.. So i asked the cher if she could let off my grp coz i was too sick to present anything.. Well, she agreed and with that, i saved my cd grp.. =P
Well, i asked the cher if the lesson she was teaching was very impt and she said yes.. so i decided to stay on and listen.. but, i couldn't pay attention at all and i just kept coughing and sneezing away.. i guess i was doing more harm than good as i felt i was disturbing the entire class. so halfway thru the lesson, i just packed my bag and left thru the back door of the classroom..
After suffering the first half of the day with the IDEAS presentation, i decided to do blogging in salc before heading straight to the crusade room.. i went down to buy some food from the noodle shop to eat.. Well, i accidentally put pepper in my noodles before realsing that i was sick.. and i was like oh my gosh!!
Alright, ate in the crusade room before deciding to study in dere.. but yeah, i was far too tired and i slowly drifted off to sleep.. Well, after my long afternoon nap, i went to class.. Well, i kept coughing during the entire lesson and even though a few of my classmates and the teacher asked me to go home and rest, i was like so stubborn.. i just wanted to stay on.. well, i payed the price where 3 times during the lesson i had to rush to the toilet to cough and cough..
Also, during the last part of the lesson, i jut couldn't pay attention the the lecturer and i just wished to lesson would end sooner.. after the lesson, i headed to the crusade room..
Well, today as i was walking back home from the crusade room, i was feeling very sick.. and as i was walking towards the mrt, i kept coughing and i almost vomited.. Oh man.. well, when i got home, my mum told me to go see a doctor and not delay.. She said that its not worth saving the money to see the doctor if my condition just keeps getting worse.. Also, my house already run out of cough medicine.. so , bo bian.. have to go.. Alright, i brought my textbook along to study at the clinic.. it was a very long queue.. My queue no was 20 but the doctor was still taking patient no 13.. -.-"
Alright.. at least the tv in the clinic was on.. Hmm.. its tht show where bryan wong and mark lee challenge each other to see who has better home furnishing skills.. what was that show called again? hmm.. well, bryan won.. (as usual) and its like almost every episode i see of that show bryan always wins.. hah.. at the end of the show, (mark lee was strangling bryan wong..) =P
Hmm.. when it came to the 19 paitient.. a little boy.. well, he acted very smug and proud and gave me a very irritating face.. i tried to tolerate him.. But when he opened the door to the doctors office, he tried to act very gentlemanly and even asked his mum to enter the room first.. Then, when hi mum was opening the door, he hopped into the room.. almost as if he was trying to win the doctor over..his actions were kinda sick..
Well, the mum and child took like 10 whole mins just to come out of the room.. Wah.. here i was in the clinic coughing like mad and here they were taking their time.. Somemore the little boy looked so healthy to me.. After he came out of the doctors office, he was still jumping around with joy.. Alright, i soon found out that the doctors in clinics now charge consultation fees also according to time spent witht the patient.. So i guess the doctor was more than happy to stay on with his "foolish" patient and his mum..
Well, it was finally my turn to see the doctor.. Alright, i told him what conditions i had and well he asked me to describe to him what kind of cough i had.. Well, i really did more describing than normal.. I kept coughing in his presence and yeah, he could take a hint.. Well, in the end, he diagnosed me with having a throat infection and also lots of phlegm and i should take an mc.. But i protested siah!! I told him i wanted to go to school.. (doesn't sound like normal school students right?) hah.. no lah.. its coz tuesday i got clm (campus life meeting) and i dun wish to miss it.. for several good reasons.. =P
Hmm.. he gave me non-drowsy medicine and still gave me an mc.. Well, it was up to me if i wanted to turn up in school.. But i kept telling myself that no matter what happens, i will still turn up for school, and for clm..
Now playing: Angel City - Do you know
Sneal lyrics:
Do you know
Don't look back on yesterday
I believe we can find a way
Don't let hopes and dreams fade
Don't hesitate it's not too late
Yesterday morning i woke up coughing and coughing.. well, it seemed that i had fallen sick.. well, i had sore throat and as i tried to study, i just couldn't concentrate.. Every now and then i was coughing away..Oh my.. i feel i'm starting get sick more regularly.. ok, when i went to talk to my dad, it was like my voice had totally changed.. i sounded more like croaking and i had to repeat what i wanted to say many many times before my dad could understand me.. My mum as well..
Well, my mum came to the rescue again.. gave me some cough syrup to drink.. Well, it worked.. and for the entire sunday afternoon i went out with my friends without coughing..
But, when i came back home, i started coughing again..
Hmm.. today i had my IDEAS presentation.. and, my throat hurt badly!! i was struggling to talk and thankfully, i didn't cough during the presentation.. Well, after trying to say out my slides during the presentation was like torture..my voice also sounded different.. After the presentation, when we set down and waited for another group to finish presenting, i kept coughing even though i was trying my best to control myself.. I'm now blogging in the SALC and i have bought a bottle of mineral water.. not sure how long its goingg to last but i am still coughing away.. sigh..
Well, today i aslo woke up wiht a splitting headache.. everytime i tried to move my head, it hurt!! The feeling was almost as if i kept bobbing my head up and down for an entire night in a dance club.. And its like i can't keep moving my head or i'll feel terrible.. I need panadol lah!! I better rush over to the shop at the mrt station to buy some panadol..
Hmm.. yesterday i went to search for some backmasking websites that showed the music and lyrics of certain songs that were supposed to contain satanic meanings when played backwards.. Well, there were many many songs that were found to contain such meanings and i was quite spooked aFter hearing those songs backwards.. So, i began praying to the lord and well, i felt
much better after that..
Well, i also prayed for the lord to show me how i should deal with relationships.. i also prayed for the lord to show me if i should wait.. Well, i have this feeling that the lord wants me to free mYself from such distractions and wait for the right moment..
I will continue to pray and ask god what he'll have me do..
Now playing: Sonic flood - Lord i lift your name on high
Sneak lyrics:
"You came from Heaven to earth
To show the way
From the earth to the cross
My debt to pay
From the cross to the grave
From the grave to the sky
Lord I lift Your name on high"
Well, this is kinda funny.. taken from the talkingcock.com website.. =) How You Are In Love The Keys to Your Heart
Are our neighbours going apeshit after watching too many fake Kong DVDs, or could there be plausible reasons why they're now spotting sasquatches? Here are some reasons why Bigfoot might actually be living in JB:
1. The beauty ‘saloons’ there give really cheap haircuts
2. They’re the grandchildren of Ann Darrow and King Kong. En route back to New York from Skull Island (remember, they said it was near Singapore), they stopped by JB to pick up some cheap DVDs and got romantic at the Holiday Inn… (Eh, anything is possible when you believe in giant apes!)
3. Either that or someone got a bit too friendly with the local orangutans.
4. JB is so good at copying American DVDs, so why shouldn’t they be able to copy American mythical creatures too?
5. The JB Tourism Authorities just couldn’t find a mascot weird enough to compete with the Merlion.
6. JB oreddy got First Link and Second Link, so why not Missing Link also?
You tend to give more than take in relationships.
You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time.
You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.
You are fickle and tend to fall out of love easily. You bounce from romance to romance.How Are You In Love?
Hmm.. well its kinda true.. but wait till u see the next test.. =)
In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.
You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.
Your ideal relationship is traditional. Without saying anything, both of you communicate with your hearts.
Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.
You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.
In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.What Are The Keys To Your Heart?Alright.. i just didn't feel that blogthings.com was very accurate but surprisingly, when i took this test, it was EXACTLY WHAT I WAS!!! OH MY GOSH!!
I just dunno why.. i really don't.. all along i have always wanted to free myself from any relationships.. i just wanted to concentrate on God's work.. But its just that this semester i am starting to like someone.. Someone i've known since last semester.. I know its weird but somehow i am torn between 2 worlds.. I am really confused.. And that person just seems to care a lot everytime we talk (and its been days since we last talked..) and i am now quite frustrated deep inside.. Do i really want to take that path again?
Why is it just so difficult to free from relationships.. I really don't have that much time for such things.. And i really like my life right now.. Carefree and happy go lucky.. But no matter how hard i try to stop such temptations, It just seems to come back at me with an even greater force.. Christians don't lose hope.. But, i think i am losing hope..
I really should start praying if this is the path that the lord wants me to go.. I don't really know if she has the same feelings as me, but i know i may never be good enough for her.. And the truth hurts alot..
Something tells me that i should just carry on with life.. but something also tells me that i may live to regret it.. I am really so confused.. I just don't have the time or maybe even enough experience to have a relationship.. I don't think i am good enough for anyone.. So why do i feel this way?
Oh lord.. pls show me why i am feeling such strong emotions.. I just don't wish to let such emotions take over my life and prevent me and her from carrying out your mighty works..
But then again.. if its the lord's decision and his will.. Who am i to change that??
I know i am not close to her currently and i have made many mistakes in our friendship.. But, why do i still feel this way.. Sometimes i just feel that its easier to approach other people than her.. I think its because my emotions are controlling me.. Will i regret this? Does she know that i have feelings for her? Does she have feelings for me too?
Why do i care so much for her.. I feel so troubled by the answer to my question.. I just don't understand.. I think she likes someone else already.. ( i definitely think so) So, if she does, then isn't it foolish to just keep wasting my time thinking of her? Is this love?
Oh lord.. i'm so confused.. Pls show me the path you wish me to take..
Its now time to reflect on the past year and to come up with the most memorable events of the year...I have come up with a most popular list as seen in my own eyes.. =P
Most weird flyer seen in Singapore :
West Mall..At the 2 wooden doors dere got a few pieces of papers tht write "Please push gently"..its still dere..
Comments: (juz makes me so tempted to give the doors a hard kick..)
Understatement of the year:
Obviously it had to come from a Singaporean.. And, the award goes to ... *drum roll*...Johnny of the radio show "Zhng my car".. Downloadable at www.mrbrown.com Well, i liked his catch phrase so much that i just had to place it in the no 1 spot.. And, his catch phrase was... "I like techno.. Techno good.." ahahaha..
Most popular Singapore website:
And the winner.. For dunno how many consecutive years goes to .. TALKINGCOCK. COM!! Can be viewed at.. www.talkingcock.com Please use ie explorer 6 or higher for the best viewing experience.. WARNING.. Certain material in the website may not be suitable for the viewing of children.. Parents, please be warned..
Most popular fashion trend:
This year, it goes to the colourful bands seen on almost every teens wrists.. Apparently, it has surived through being out of trend for an entire year!! Keep it up!!
More to be added soon..Do wait for the changes in this blog..
Ok.. i have changed over 3 blog skins in 1 hr.. Happy with this for now.. Well, i hope to have a better blog skin by nxt week.. i hope*
Ok.. this entire week was extremely stressful.. I dunno why but i always sleep at 12-1 o clock at night and everytime i take bus 106 home, ppl always have to wake me up when we reach the bkt batok interchange.
Shit.. 2 of my exam paper results werre released this week.. Opsy and Netf... Well, techincally i have improved.. Last sem i was getting like 20+ marks? 30+ marks? And all is like last in class or 2nd last in class.. But now, i am passing my exams!! WOooHoOo!! I got 52 marks for my Opsy..The result of hardwork and peserverance.. =) But got ppl i know get like 90+ marks.. Wah liao!! And then, my netf got 49.5.. T_T But, round off is still 50 right? Pass lah.. ahahaha.. I better not lie to myself.. =P
Hmm.. just this week i fixed my mp3 at creative hq.. Well, they gave me a new mp3 coz my old one was "beyond repair".. Or thts what they say.. -.-" Hmm.. i forgot to back up my files.. SHIT.. But lucky, i got put bits and pieces of my files everwhere in my 2 comps at home.. The music files i also have in my home comps.. But the worst thing was, i didn't back up my web publishing assignment and i had to redo it all over again!! All my hard work down the drain!! Arrgghh!! Well, i also didn't back up my Visual Basic test in my mp3.. So if the diskette i pass to cher cannot run then i dun have another copy to pass to cher!! Siao Liao Lah!!! Prays tht the diskette can work!! (Last sem my diskette couldn't work.. so if this sem cannot then.. er.. Straits times headlines.. "A Singapore Polytechnic IT student has jumped to his death from the 25th floor of his blk because he knew he was gg to fail his Vbas asasignment" =P.. jkjk..
Also, yesterday during my cca dg, we went to play badminton.. Ok,actually i wanted to go home coz i was really sibei tired but i still stayed on.. my efforts payed off!! i was searching the crusade cabinet for badminton rackets but i found none.. But instead, i found the brown colour campus crusade t-shirt tht i was searchhing all over for!! Last time i asked everyone if tht t-shirt was still selling but they all said tht there was no more stock and they were not gg to make anymore of tt shirt.. But, hey, i found a L size of tht t-shirt inside the crusade cabinet!! I quickly grabbed it siah!! Then i called the crusade treasurer and asked if the shirt was reserved.. She said no..And those were the magic words.. I hurriedly took out 7 dollars from my wallet without thinking and stuffed it into the treasurers pigeon hole..Well, ltr when my dgl searched the cabinet a 2nd time, he found a usable badminton racket.. then scold me say i am blind siah.. but nvm.. at least i saw the t-shirt tht i was dying to have..I tink i acting like a bit desperate siah.. =P Today, i a bit kiasu.. Wearing tht t-shirt to sch juz to make sure tht it is not reserved.. Coz if it is reserved, i dun tink anyone would want to buy tht t-shirt when it is already worn by somebody else right.. ahah.. =)
Hmm.. now i feel very sianz.. I rushed to sch frm home on friday.. today lah.. coz i thought today got opsy lesson.. I even brought my heavy opsy book with me.. When i reach t17, i realised tht cher already canceled the lesson last week and gave us a makeup this monday liao.. SHIT.. i am so blur.. Well, i knew tht i was suppose to have IDEAS grp meeting at tht time.. So i tried to call my grp members.. But in the end, Siao Liao lah!! My hp low batt and switched off!! What else can go wrong siah!! So in the end i decided to go to my crusade room to hang.. But, no one was inside!! I was alone!! Crap!! Then i decided to take out my mp3 and also my can drink to start chilling.. But then i realised i had no earphones!! My earphones all spoiled by my younger brother liao.. Then the earphones tht i had been using was borrowed frm a classmate. who had taken the earphones back yesterday.. So now i was like ----> -.-" What a day.. My mp3 last time not working but my earphones were working.. So couldn'yt listen to my music.. Now, my mp3 is working but my earphones not working.. So now still cannot lisaten to mp3.. =( And also, those gd quality earpghones are like so expensive..ard $50 dollars!! And, i am currently broke!! my expenses are killing me!! Arrgghhh!!
So in the end, i decided to go salc to play comp games and blog lorx.. Haixx.. ltr 1 O'clock still got gems.. sianz!!!
I'M CURRENTLY UPDATING MY BLOG.. ITS STILL UNDER CONSTRUCTION, AND ALL MY BLOG CODES ARE IN A HUGE MESS.. I REALLY NEED HELP.. =(
Isaac ying spins tunes as
DJ DARKANGEL
This t-shirt is part of an auction done by the Cat Welfare Society Singapore.. And well, guess who signed this t-shirt? Cyndi Wang.. haha.. sure a lot of bidders for this t-shirt..
Today starts my MASSIVE DEFAMEMENT of the new director of SMA..
U know ah.. This **** used to be the director of SAA in Sp.. Well, my dad is actually very well liked in SMA.. Even the technicians at SMA respect him greatly.. Well, if u have noticed, my dad is the assistant director of SMA.. Well, he was so pissed with **** taking the new position as Director even though he has lesser qualifications.. If u dun believe that **** has lesser qualifications, u can go and see for yourself.. This is taken direct from the SMA website and it shows clearly.. My dad has more qualifications that that guy lehx!!
Director
**** , BSc (Hons) Maritime Commerce, MBA (Lancaster), MMIS
Deputy Directors
Marketing & Industry Services
Ying Hing Leong, Tech Dip (Marine), First Class Engineer (Motor), BSc (Computer Science), MSNAMES
Course Management
**** , Master (FG), MSc (Maritime Mgmt), MSNI
But then wah lau ehx. **** use some kind of political connection with the principal to get his new position as the Director of SMA.. He was quite close to the principal and so the principal gave him the job.. **** also used alecturer who didn't like my dad to go against him by calling in some political grouping to step in.. Afraid that things might go to the press, the principal quietly gave the job to****.. I really hate that guy lehx.. Apparently, there was this lecturer under the supervision of my father. But he was very lazy and didn't do his job properly. So, my dad refused to reccomend him for a pay rise.. As a result, that lecturer has always been mad at my father..
Well, my dad has resigned from his job as Deputy Director.. To tell you the truth, many lecturers in SMA have already resigned coz there is too much politics at work now.. And, my dad quit also for anther reason.. U see ah, that **** isn't as qualified right? So anything he doesn't know how to manage he will just push to my dad to do.. And he gets all the credit for it..
I tell u, this is so UNFAIR.. Somemore, that **** clamis to be a staunch Christian.. Yeah right.. A staunch Christian will just anyhow backstab ppl for his job.. *pukes*
Somemore, the former director of SMA already said that my dad would be the new director of SMA.. Did u know that my dad helped build up SMA alot.. For more than 13 over years, he has leped grow SMA like mad..He also taught taufik before.. ahahaha.. =P
To further my prove that my dad is indeed more qualified to take on the position of director, please look at my dads qualification list.. He is a First Class marine engineer.. (that is like the best of the best marine engineer qualification in Singapore..) last time before he became a lecturer in Sp, he was one of the best Marine Engineers in Singapore.. and he was earning 8 times what he is earning now.. But he became a lecturer to have more time with his family.. Did u know that Marine Engineers only return to Singapore once every 6 months??
But nowadays, my dad seems quite affected by what has happened in SMA.. he has been drinking more often and also golfing alot with friends overseas.. I still remembered how he was so crazy as to fly to shanghai just to play golf with his friend on buisness there.. And, everytime he asked me if i had eaten, and i replied that i had eaten in Sp, he would get upset.. Basically, the mere mention of Sp is enough to cause him to feel very upset.. Also, during the few months where he was staying in Sp after resignation to allow the principal to find a new assistant dorector, he kept staying at home more often and was always very unwilling to go to School.. I guess it really did a great damage to his ego.. Well, in every school in Sp, hardy anyone knows the name of the asst-director.. They only know the directors name.. Well, it so happens that the director of the campus crusade for christ in Singapore is also called ****.. So when i heard of this, i mistook both of them to be the same person and i almost vomited.. lol.. Also, when i went to the SMA website a few months ago to view the directors message, it sounded so fake..I wanted to vomit on the spot..
Hmm.. the only reason why i feel so safe posting this is coz my dad has already resigned form his job and is now working for another big shipping company in Singapore.. Lolyds register.. Well, wish him luck there.. Anyways, **** is getting his just desserts.. Because he knows so little abt maritime, he is now being hated by almost every single students in SMA.. I know coz a few of my friends are from SMA and they tell me that they all dun like him alot.. They are also suspicious on how come he was once director of SAA and then he just suddenly jump position to Director of SMA.. Today is also officially my dad's last day in Sp.. Over this week, he has been making regular trips to Sp to collect all his stuff from his office and relocating it to his new office.. I will miss that office.. I used to go inside there as a yound kid.. And, i will miss all my dad's colleagues in SMA.. Used to drop visits to them when i still wasn't a student in Sp..
I have tried talking this over with my crusade staff and friends.. Well, they told me to forgive him.. even though he is clearly a christian who wants to be seen and is not acting the christian way.. Well, i am trying hard to do so.. But, if he ever comes to support the campus crusade in Sp, i will be SO mad.. He doesn't deserve to be called a Christian LAH!!
Lyrics of Demon Hunter.. Surprisingly, a Christian band..
Artist: Demon Hunter
Album: Summer Of Darkness
Track: Anihilate The Corrupt
Behind the eyes of my compassion lies a suffering soul
And in my blood a bitter darkness slowly taking it's toll
I feel the death of our connection and the fading of light
Between the shards of sudden panic from choking on my life
I see the scars of your addiction and the feeling you hide
A blackened heart from all the hatred you will never rewind
Within the depths of your depression hear you pleading for help
Your just a shell of vacant ruin, a portrait of myself.
I can't breathe alone
You can guide me home.
CHORUS:I am the face of your affliction.
Feeding new life through the cracks in your skull.
Beneath the skin of your aggression is a thickening fear
A swelling plague from every devastating voice that you hear
You feel the throes of contradiction in the world that you left
Another day in your delusion, the never-ending death.
I can't breathe alone
You can guide me home
I can feel you here
You can draw me near
CHORUS:I am the face of your afflication.
Feeding new life through the cracks in your skull.
I am the pain of your conviction
Stabbing you right through the back of your soul.
This is life, this is love
(CHORUS)I can feel you here
You can draw me near.
Artist: P.O.D.
Album: Snuff The Punk
Track:
Three In The Power Of One
Souls black as
But it's nothing for the children of God to fight
We wrestle not with flesh and blood
But with the principalities of darkness
So put on your armor of God
For the day of battle will come
But the victory is already ours
Through Christ in the power of one
The Power of Christ
Surrounded by the angels of God
Step to the realm where evil reigns
We are soldiers prepared for war
With the power to speak his name
Satan with his legion of demons
Deceiving with his wicked ways
With his life he has paid
With his word
I will slay
Any demon that steps in my way
So bring it on
Bring it on
It's the P.O.D. on the mic rockin' the set
In case you didn't know Payable On Death
Making suckers drop, kick'n non stop
The hard rock'n thrash, with a little hip hop
Four christians brother on a roll, there we go
Coming up hard, but you know we got soul
I'm strapped, yes we're packed, and it's about time
Jesus got my back P.O.D.'s on the frontline
Three in the power of one, three in the power of one
Three in the power of one, three in the power of one
Three in the power of one, three in the power of one
Three in the power of one, three in the power of one
You are 26 yrs old.. Your Inner Child Is Naughty You Should Learn Chinese Your Ideal Relationship is Serious Dating Your Dating Purity Score: 96%
13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.
20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.
30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!
40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.What Age Do You Act?Hahah... am i really that matured??
How Is Your Inner Child?Woah ..this is so cool..
What Language Should You Learn?YUCKS!! I SHOULD LEARN CHINESE?? YUCKS!!
erm.. is this true? hah
Dating Purity Testhmm.. thts so true..
BLUE
You give your love and friendship unconditionaly. You enjoy long, thoughtful conversations rich in philosophy and spirituality. You are very loyal and intuitive.
Blogging bout yesterday.. coz yesterday nigth i too tired to blog liao.. =P
Hmm..iets see.. yesterday was fully packed for me.. in the morning i went to city hall mrt for my gen12 ii team meeting..we had only 4 members from Sp.. and one staff.. (who wanted to go overseas to help the chiristian ministry but in the end was posted with us..) But its kinda good coz i really dunno her well.. now got chance to know her better.. =)
So we met up at city hall mrt (9.30) and headed down to the nearest macdonalds.. we went upstairs to sit and i was attracted instantly by the free flow of coffee.. So i quickly rush down to buy a student meal.. (normally breakfast set if 5 dollars but students pay only 4 dollars) Then come up, we discuss bout what we wanna do for our mission trip in Singapore.. Coz at first, our mission trip's name was called pioneering campuses.. But, cannot go universities to pioneer campuses as we only had 5 members in our team.. But then, 1 girl, (a tp girl) had some problems and so dropped out of the team after discussing with her dgl.. (didn't get to see her at all.. whose she?)
Well, we decided to change our team name to M.I.B (Mission in Backyard).. It sounds kinda cool yeah? And well, we decided to have our team trainings every campuses crusade harvest day held on the wednesday afternoon each week.. Then team meetings would follow and we hope to stop all meetings 2 weeks before the poly end of yr exams.. But after the exams, we will intensify our trainings till its time for us to go on the mission..
What is our mission doing now?
Well, we have decided to reach out the Sp.. Mainly the chinese international students.. We also wish to reach out to another insitutions nursing fellowship.. It consists of mainly foreign students coming to Singapore to study nursing.. Well, we hope to organise certain events for them during the holidays to reach out to them..
Hmm.. we will be staying at the GCTC.. Thats our campus crusade headquarters at dunno where.. I seriously forgot the place liao.. =P But if i leak out the adress ltr it might kena bombed by terrorists.. then i siao liao lah!! Hmm.. But, i know its somewhat near Sp.. and also somewhat near Sentosa.. Wow.. right in the middle..
Sianz..forerunner will be located nxt door.. (Forerunner, is 1 of 3 christian bands set up by the Campus Crusade for Christ ministries to reach out to the lsot in Singapore and ard the world thru music..) I hate their band practices siah!! Always so noisy.. Somemore, i tink they are very action and proud of themselves.. Can play mucic then so what? There are other christian bands in Sg who i feel can play much better than u all but are not action as u guys ok!! Last time i got peek at their jamming sessions and wah lau ehx.. They all running ard playing like small kids.. Then i always hear that they are like jamming together almost every other day.. They no sch issit?? Dropouts?? Hahh.. shall not comment.. But hey, u can find their music cd's in many Christian shop catalogues in Singapore..
Hmm.. after the meeting we took some pictures.. Wooh.. lucky i was wearing my contacts that day.. hah.. was almost deciding not to wear them coz i was too lazy..
After that, i rushed back to bkt batok interchange to take a bus to my church.. Cosbt.. Wah lua.. went to bus interchange but bus 852 just left!! If only i run frm the mrt station to interchange siah!! Then sian lorx.. had to wait for anther bus.. Lucky the bus came fast..
Happy to say i went to church for cellgrp on time.. (30 mins earlier.. -.-")
Hmm.. we had lots of ice breaker games to start of the new yr.. My cell had 2 new members.. One guy who just graduated from my sec sch and me..
Ok we had several ice breaker games before we went to worship and devotion..
I shared to my cell grp how i kept rembering my grandpas death when in church coz it was somewhat related.. Last time, I wanted to ask he cantonese congretion in my church to reach out to my grandparents.. And er.. the cantonese congretions former room for its sunday services was quite close by.. Erm.. the memories of my grandpa when i visited him in his Hospital ward in SGH kept flooding by.. It really hurt.. I dun tink i will ever return to SGH.. and i just felt a sudden despair.. I kept rembering how one moment he was still in the SGH ward and able to talk and eat and drink and watch tv.. And the nxt moment, he was gone.. All becuase he's organs failed..
Then when we went on to sing the christian song titled Here i am.. Well, as we sang up till the "I will go where u send me Jesus take me now i am yours" I was so filled with anguish that i wantesd to burst into tears.. It seems that even though i have been trying to put up a brave front to everone i knew, i still had not come into terms with my grandpas death.. And they say the truth hurts.. alot.. It was almost as if it sturck me again that i had failed to complete god's command to reach to the lost..
i would have burst into tears, if not for the contact lenses i was wearing..
After the song, we went on to group sharings.. the sisters went to one corner, while the borthers another corner..I was quiote open on how i felt bout this church, and we were all chatting bout what needed to be improved in this church, and how the atmosphere for worship in the church aservices were not good conditions to actualy worship god.. Well, we talked bout many ppl who try to act holy in church but their lifes outside are a mess, and how there are many ppl who are not true brothers and sisters in church.. even went to talk bout my former cell grp.. philadelphia.. Hmm.. then we also discussed bout what was the diff btwn giving our opinions and judging others..
Ok.. normally i dun go into such detail bout my life.. But today i juz want to share this coz the events that happened very much ltr are linked..
Went for yesterdays church service..(snl) we were all worshipping god together and i just didn't want to jump coz i felt it was pointless.. (Other churches youth dun jump or dance.. so why shld we be the special ones? Also , i dun tink i have seen the pastors jumping?)
Well, this made me recall the xmas event in my church a few weeks back.. I remebered how this one guy came up to mwe as we were worshipping god and asked why i didn't want to jump.. I gave him a simple reply.. Worshipping god is not always bout jumping..
Ok, i just want to explain.. I mean, ppl might say tht we jump coz we are overjoyed that we are born again.. (pastor daniel shared why we jump or why we raise our hands to praise god) Hmm.. i already knew why we did so, but it seemed that 2 yrs ago, i didn't.. and i was too scared to find out why coz i felt ppl might laugh at me.. ok that was liek the past..
then pastor daniel said that if some ppl are non-movers in church, leave them alone and concentrate on other non-christians to see to their salvation.. (Hey, sorry if i got whatever u said wrong pastor daniel) At tht point.. i was like HUH? OH MY GOSH? If u dun care bout the non-movers, then what if they backslide from church?? Hey i am very concerned bout ppl who backslide from cosbt ok!! I was once one!!
Then i feel that when i was jumping in church 2 yrs back, it was bcoz others were doing it and so i wanted very much to follow the crowd.. And, i feel many youths in church are still doing tht.. Even though they are told repeatedly the reason why they should do that..
U can clearly see wad.. its like certain parts of the song where many ppl stop jumping, they will jump for a while before realising that they are no longer part of the crowd anymore and then slowly stop jumping!! WAH LIAO EHX!! I AM CORRECT RIGHT?? This kind of thing is like SO OBVIOUS LORX!! If u really want to jump for joy, u would do so even though nobody does it with you.. Coz, it is your PERSONAL relationship with god.. and u should NEVER care about what others think as u worship god!!
Got a few surprises yesterday when it was annouced that 2 church workers were becoming pastors and that the church youth services in our church were expanding to 2 more sessions a week.. So thts like 3 services a week?? Hmm.. well, one of the new pastors was my bb officer.. Well, he was talkig bout how when we sleep we release dreams.. and this kinda make me think back to my 2002 mission trip where i was his bunk mate and he just freaked me out that night when he kept rising up and down from his bed with his arms stretched out.. I still remembered rushing to the door of the hotel room and taking out my bible to pray.. Hahahaha..
But ltr the nxt morning of the mission trip he told me tht he was jsut playing a prank on me.. And then everyone who heard it laughed.. -.-" Well tht was like when i was in sec 2?
Ok during half of my bb officers sermon, i had to leave for my friends Sp chinese Orchestra performance.. Hmm.. went all the way to the bus stop to wait for a bus.. But shit!! The bus take so long to come!! In the end, i took a taxi to Sp.. Wasted $5.70 on taxi fare!!And the ticket to the Chinese Orchestra performance i paid like $5.00 before?? So altogether its like $10.70??
Hmm.. the Chinese Orchestra had tied in with the Chiense language Society to produce their concert.. Well, the mc for that day was from the cls and the Singers for that day (except one who was co)were also from the cls..The performances were quite good and i kinda liked one of the singers voices that night.. really good.. But i was wondering why she nvr participate in all those Sp singing competitions.. Hmmz..
Ok.. thats bout all.. God bless all the readers today..
Hmm.. today had a hard time persuading my mum to sign my gen12 ii application form.. Well, she ask me so many questions bout gen 12 ii and she had so many phone calls and was so busy tht it really tested my paitence a lot.. Ok, the gen12 ii is an annual mission trip organised by the campus crusade for christ Singapore.. It combines crusaders from all the diff polys together to go for mission trips to many diff countries like Thailand, East Asia, Cambodia, Australia, malaysia, South Africa, and even one with a band selection where promising crusaders get to form a band and tour around the world to spread god's love!!
Hmm.. I really thank my dgl for talking to my mum abt the gen12 ii during my grandpa's wake.. Really.. I would nvr have had the courage to ask my mum permission to go for it.. Thankfully, my disciple grp leader managed to do so.. Its also a plus point tht my mum taught my dgl for one of his modules last sem.. And so, my mum knows my dgl to be a very nice and hardworking person.. thank goodness for tht.. =)
Hmm.. its finally after my MST!! Its time to celebrate for a few days before i get back to intensive revision for my final yr exams!! Bought new contacts.. Decided to wear them once again coz i am really starting to get sick of wearing specs liao.. -.-"
Might consider dying my hair once again.. But, that really depends.. Coz, i just dun feel like dying my hair to some weird colour again.. Also, i am a bit lazy.. =P Then i also know tht christians shld not juz anyhow dye their hair or wax their hair to create appearances.. Coz god created us for who we are and so we should not anyhow alter what is came naturally to us.. So tht means no tattoos or any piercings.. haixx.. sadz.. But long hair.. still acceptable bahz? =P
Ok.. i have decided to stop buying new techno albums.. i find it pointless.. i mean its like everytime a new album comes out i go bankrupt coz i always have this impulse to buy it.. Diao.. techno u collect also cannot collect finish one lah.. Coz dere will always be new albums comingout.. I tink i might as well juz go support the cheaper alternative.. Piracy.. Yeah.. P2P downloading.. Risky but the rewards are dere.. =P
Decided to fix my mp3 soon.. Fed Up with my half spoilt mp3 that cannot play techno properly.. Also need to get a new set of ear phones for my mp3 coz my creative ear phones are busted.. Shit.. its after the festive season and i am still spending.. Already making huge losses buying my contacts coz i didn't buy it ard the Christmas period.. Spectacle Hut in West Mall (WAS) having a 70 percent discount on all its products lehx!!! WAH LIAO!! 70%!!! SHIT LAH!!
What else.. zzzzzz... brand new sch bag? i'm still deciding.. coz i'm short of cash fast..Juz thursday i had 260 dollars.. now its reduced to juz 100 plus dollars.. Crap.. new clothes i will be getting.. Mum's paying for it though.. (Coz its also used for chinese new year mahz..) ^^
New handphone ah? (hey, i'm practically gg thru my entire wish list) =) Dun wan bah? i no $$ and my dad promised to get me a new plan with new hp if i score well for this sem.. Hmm.. food for thought.. my handphone also can do basic functions liao..If i want bluetooth i can wait long long lah!! Btw, i'm now using a starhub prepaid plan and it has its good and bad points lah.. Dun wish to comment anymore..
Hehe.. my hair dye is still lying at home.. all i need to do is juz apply it and hehe.. hair golden yellow liao.. But still considering heavily.. I kinda regretted buying the hair dye coz i like my black hair now.. sobz.. =(
I also realised sth urgent.. i jsut cannot keep placing all my earlier posts in my blog!! It kinda lags otu my blog and i really need my archive link section back asap!! But siao liao!! I tired out the coding before but it just wouldn't work.. Shit.. I want my archive links back!! If one day my postings get too many then die lorx.. Either i only show my most recent postings in my blog only or my blog becoem sibei laggy till cannot acess.. -.-"
Then horx, when i was viewing my blog one day, i found out sth startling with my blog.. The change was so obvious yet i did not notice it!! I tried to view my blog in all the diff. web browsers but still the same effect!! Oh My Gosh!! And, the change is not i wanted!! Ok lah.. i better tell u all what tht change is.. Did u all notice tht...
... my blog skin has now become smaller?? Goshes!! Just a month ago i could only view a part of the entire skin.. Now its like the skin has shrank to a smaller size!! But i didn't change any of the coding!!! Ok, maybe i edited a bit of the scroll bars colours and maybe i chaged a bit of the words dere.. <------- Also changed the snow flakes falling to rain.. But tht was it!! Oh my goodness.. Now i dun really like my skin liao!! Arrrggghhh!! Hping to find a new skin soon!! Blogskins.com here i come!!
Hmm.. yupz.. thts bout all.. Hope you guys will stay blessed by the lord always!!
Today was the worst MST day in my poly life.. Waahh!! All the papers today were like so hards.. Today networking test all the most unexpected questions came out.. I study wrong thing also lah!! All those i concentrate on in the netf text book, nvr come out!! Somemore i so stupid to memorise the definition of what "packet" what "frame" what "field".. I also go and study the definition of the diff layer of the OSI model and also their use.. In the end, i cram too much in my head, go exam room all forgot liao.. Siao liao lah!! Also the test got one question is base on one of our netf assignments.. But SHIT!! I totally forgot everthing that i did for the assignment!! When i was studying i even though tht since assignment come out tht topic liao then tht topic exam sure won't come out.. I was so wrong.. (Regrets..)
Then come webp.. I starting already got problem liao.. Create my first pg like so slow.. Also, when i ask the cher in charge questions, she come and give me that fuck face.. Anyhow give all those ppl who ask her questions attitude.. go and say what "You should know" or "Just do what u think is correct".. PLEASE LORX!! IF i knew how to do i wouldn't have asked u right??
Then i think i the most kelian of all the ppl doing the web publishing test.. I think i ask the most questions all the way until the cher too fedup and come ask me if i always pon teen the webp praticals one.. Wah liao ehx!! How can u anyhow accuse ppl!! I got come for all my webp practicals ok!! Somemore i ask my webp cher lots of questions during practicals.. I also got take dreamweaver crash course before poly ok!!
But sibei siao.. the entire webp test i like left almost everything blank.. Then when i look ard at all my other classmates they like progressing so fast.. So i got very scared.. Almost wanted to cry when i couldn't even make out a page.. Felt like leaving the comp lab and just break down in tears outside.. I can tell u, in the 1hr and 30 mins, i was SO stressed!!
I kept thinking how to answer to my webp cher when the test results were to be released later.. I was like gg to tell her that i was very very stressed during the exam and so i just messed it up.. Even wanted to ask her (more like beg her) after the webp test for a second chance..
Even said to myself.. "Die liao Nxt time must chiong my webp assignment and get very very high marks for it to ensure i pass webp.."
Then the worst thing happened.. Siao Liao!! My dreamweaver got error and just shut itself down!! I panicked like mad siah!! Quickly asked cher what to do and i felt like i was gg to die in the exam hall.. I kept thinknig tht all was lost..
Ok after i restarted my dreamweaver, i managed to do a bit here and dere.. But i was still very disillusioned with how i could even get 10 marks.. To me, it was like i could only get a fat fail grade.. I quickly tell the cher in charge tht the test paper was really messy and i just could not see anything out of it.. (The mock test that we had was like so clear lorx!!) she go and counter.. say that its very easy to read.. Wah liao!! Of coz easy for you to read lah!! Its you who set the paper wad!!
After the chers in charge say to stop our webp test, i can confirm tht no one cmpleted the webp test.. Even the fastest student in other classes and in our class managed to do up till pg 9 or 10 of like 16 pages..
After the exam, i hear frm everyone tht the paper was indeed diff.. So i was like.. phew.. I thought i was the only one gg to fry.. And, in othe rclasses, even good hardworking students were complaining and some also did ard the same amt as me.. Thank the lucky stars.. I am not gg to be alone.. I juz hope that moderation of the paper will be quite lenient.. I can confirm that the chers who mark all of our papers will vomit blood..
Masterboy - Generation Of Love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Give me all your loving, give me all your loving
Give me all you loving, make it true
Give me you loving, give me all you loving
Give me all you loving, me to you
Boys and girl up and down
Move your body round and round
Pump the bass up in this place
Put a smile back in your face
Take control, don't waste time
The heat is on, you're feeling fine
Feel the power from above
Call it generation of love
Baby give me all your passion
Baby give me all your love
Baby give me all your passion
Baby give me all your love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Give me all your loving, give me all your loving
Give me all you loving, make it true
Give me you loving, give me all you loving
Give me all you loving, me to you
Here I go, here I go Kiss me baby, let it flow
You know how to make it right
Light my fire, hold me tight
People of the night keep grooving
Got to get it right, you’re moving
Feel the power from above
Call it generation of love
Everybody is feeling happy
Everybody, everywhere
Everybody is feeling happy
Everybody, everywhere
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Give me all your loving, give me all your loving
Give me all you loving, make it true
Give me you loving, give me all you loving
Give me all you loving, me to you
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
March 2005
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January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
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August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
[x] World Vision International
[x] WorldWildlifeFund For Nature
[x] SPCA
[x] Cat Welfare Society
[x] -=aUdIo JuiCe.NeT=-(eURO dANCE rADIO)
[x] biblegateway
[x] who lives near you
[x] Campus Crusade Singapore
[x] free techno remixes downloads
[x]Ivan-1
[x]Ivan-2
[x]Christine(Chc)
[x]Derrick
[x]Alvin
[x]Alvin (spccc)
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[x]Stevanus
[x]Yik Shu Xek
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[x]Fang Zheng
[x]Davin
[x]Azlan
[x]Fook Yuan
[x]YuXiang
[x]LeeMin
[x]Cara
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[x]Wen Fang
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[x]Ivan
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[x]Belinda 2
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[x]Nissi Cellgroup
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[x]Stephen
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I'm "really" enjoying this festive season.. *hicks*..
Guys.. check out this website ----> http://www.themeatrix.com/!!
[The owner of this blog is currently taking an extended vacation due to the festive season.. he willl be returning in mid feb.. Do watch out for the massive changes to this blog.. coming soon..]
Something that i should be learning to do.. but i'm not..
Cast all your fears and anxieties to jesus..
Well, everytime i am feeling depressed.. everytime i am feeling down.. everytime complex emotions flood my mind, i will have this compulsion to blog it down.. i mean, its not as if i keep all my thoughts and feelings bottled up till they explode, but what i am currently doing to help release my emotions is just as bad..
Everytime something happens to me that affects my life in a great way, i will be tempted to blog it down, and vomit out all of my anger and hatred to my personal space.. this shouldn't be right.. but i am a very expressive person.. and if i don't find ppl to share my feelings, i may just go insane..thats why my blog is like my saving grace..where i can let the ppl know how i really fell deep down inside.. and what i am going through..
Well, a few ppl have asked me to turn to Jesus when i have any troubles or worries and to pray to him for help.. I am seriously considering their advice.. but its the way i share my life in my blog that makes my blog unique.. and if i don't share about my life in this way anymore, my blog will be just like those other blogs out there.. other blogs that just summarize their activities for the day.. Blogs that do not go about expressign the persons deepest thoughts.. Blogs that do not enable the reader's to gain insights over the bloggers life.. I do not wish that to happen..
Now playing Cascada- Everytime we touch
Sneak Lyrics:
"I need a miracle
I wanna be your girl
Give me a chance to see
That you are made for me
I need a miracle
Please let me be your girl
One day you'll see it can happen to me
I need a miracle
I wanna be your girl
Give me a chance to see
That you are made for me
I need a miracle
Please let me be your girl
One day you'll see it can happen to me
It can happen to me"
Yesterday, i sat down at the dinner table to eat with my dad.. Well, after he finished eating, he was lost in thought and kept staring blankly into space.. i have never seen him daydreaming before in my life.. but, yesterday, for the first time ever, i saw him stoning away.. i asked "dad, are u ok?" and well, he responded by shaking his head slightly and looking awya in another direction..
i could see from the look in his eyes that he wasn't really happy with his new job.. i guessed he missed Sp a lot.. and, this made me very sad..
As i was preparing to sleep, thoughts kept flooding my mind over the events that happened.. I kept thinking of how the new director of SMA indirectly helped ruin my family, and how he could have done much more as a christian if he had stayed as the director of SAA.. I knew that as the director of SAA, he could have easily approved more fundings or liberty to the Christian cca's in Sp to organise more club and outreach activities.. he definitely could have helped fufill the great comission in a much greater way..
I mean, he was already receiving directors pay(which is alot) before he backstabbed my dad as director of SMA.. What more could he have wanted?? The answer was obvious.. His actions were driven by pure greed..the greediness for more fame glory and publicity.. There was no other explanation for it.. He just wanted more glory to add to his name..
I kept thinking of whether he knew the importance of the great comission but i just shut my eyes and told myself not to think too much.. the events that had happened were just too painful to think abt.. i slept quite peacefully that night..
Now playing Daft Punk - One More Time
Sneak Lyrics:
"One more time...
One more time
We gonna celebrate
Oh yeah, all right
Don't stop dancing
One more time
We gonna celebrate
Oh yeah, all right
Don't stop dancing
One more time
We gonna celebrate
Oh yeah, all right
Don't stop dancing
One more time
We gonna celebrate
Oh yeah...
One more time"
Yesterday as i was preparing to go for CLM, i was walking past the auditorium nxt to the Sp convention centre and my blood boiled.. Right at the foot of the auditorium was a display of the SMA'S (Singapore Maritime Acadamy's) achievements since it started off in Sp.. I was like.. PLEASE LORX!! Without my dad helping the SMA last time, SMA wouldn't have been what it is today!!
Ok, i went to put my stuff at the CLM room before rushing back to the SMA display area..I was like so ready to stand off with the Sp principal or the new SMA director should i see them.. I was like so determined to defend my dad's reputation..
Ok, apart from some SMA students and a few "V.I.PS", i didn't see any trace of the 2 most wanted..Well, i went to scan through all the displays and my BLOOD BOILED EVEN MORE.. I saw the Sp principal's face in a lot of pictures shaking hands with vip's and signing agreements.. I kept looking at that retarded smile he was giving and i can tell you.. at those intense moments, i wanted very badly to KILL him.. i wassn't thinking straight..honest.. and my mind was a huge mess.. emotions kept flooding in and broke down into tears..
Well, my dad's abscence from Sp has somehow contributed to a sharp rise in family problems back home.. Now that he is in a job in the private sector, he keeps coming home later than his previous job as asst. director.. Now, insteads of the usual 10-11 , he is coming home at ard 11-12.. At times. it can be even later.. Well, he now has many many business appointments overseas and he is always constantly on the move.. Well, when he comes home, he will usually be too tired to help the family...
My mum is getting very frustrated over my dad's abscene and well, last sunday, she had a quarrel with my dad and well, she is now challenging my dad to a divorce.. She even asked me which side i would take should they divorce.. She's very serious and i was like so shocked.. I just kept saying "No" to my mum.. Also, my dad's paitience and temper has become very short..
Well, my mum and dad have been quarelling since i was in nursery and i rmb that once their argument was so hot that my mum just packed her bags and left for overseas.. (that was when i was in pri 1 and staying at the Sp staff apartments.)
So it's like, even though many ppl have told me to count myself blessed to be in such a well off family, i kept begging to differ..All the money in the world couldn't buy me what i needed most.. the love and care of my parents and spending quality time with them.. Who cares if i get more pocket money or if i get more material items.. CRAP IT.. If my house is always constantly a huge war zone, then whats the point..
My brother (sec 2) is also turning bad and well, i think he is close to joining a gang.. The worse thing is, my parent sthink that they understand my younger brother truely, when they don't.. In fact, i'm the one who understands my younger brother..
Pride is destroying my family to pieces.. this stronghold in my family has always exsisted and well, both of my parents just refuse to admit that they arwe wrong in certain ways and they just keep driving to the other party the msg that they are always correct and that they know whats best for the other.. they just keep trying to keep this up during their quarrels but it just doesn't work.. Both of my parents are filled with so much pride that it also makes it SO HARD for me to reach out to them.. they always feel that since they have successful lives and i don't, i shouldn't be telling them how to lead theirs with some Christian way.. Frankly speaking, my parens always say that experiences actually shape the way you wwant to live your life.. I know that they have seen alot of things and have been over exposed to the darker-side of Christianity.. Take the new director of SMA for example.. When he stepped in as Director thru some political connections, he JUST WASN'T THINKING!! I mean, he didn't pay the price for his actions, BUT MY DAD DID!! My dad has now become so disillusioned with Christianity that i just can't get anything into him and i am so afriad that his soul will be lost.. And the worse thing was, thee new director of SMA is a staunch Christian!! Doesn't he know that what he has done has indirectly help erase the attendance of another soul in heaven?? Does he know what he is doing?? Isn't he being selfish??
Well, i've said so much.. but, i still believe that God is in control over my family and that prayer will change things.. So this to all Christians.. As you read thru this posting.. i want you ppl to pray for my family.. that we will see the softening of the hearts of my family and that God will use me to share the Gospel once agin to them, that they will believe once more and be saved.. Pray that the stronghold of pride will not be a stumbling block in communication in my family and that we will be a loving family to the very end.. Also, pray that everyone of us will not bottle up our feelings and that averyone of us will have good time management and my dad can effectively prioritise family time at home.. God bless you all..
Now playng DaddyDJ - Daddy DJ
Sneak Lyrics:
"Daddy DJ, please take me to the party
And let me dance along, until the lights are on
Daddy DJ, please take me to the party
And let the music play, until the break of day "
Average@Internet-User.com (41% - 60%) Now playing: Baracuda - I leave the World today Sneak Lyrics: "The winters told me everything but I am on my way, I don't need no more diamond rings, I leave the world today. But you can tell a thousand lies to think that I would stay, cause I am not a fool for you, I leave the world today..." Are you Addicted to the Internet? 45%
You seem to have a healthy balance in your life when it comes to the internet and life away from the computer. You know enough to do what you want online without looking like an idiot (most of the time). You even have your own Yahoo club or online journal! But you enjoy seeing your friends and going out to enjoy life away from your computer.
Alrite.. really pissed with my bro.. Well, apparently his addiction for maple story has taken new bounds.. When i told him nicely to leave the comp coz i needed to do my IT assignments, he just refused.. Kept giving me that stuck up attitude and kept refusing to give up the comp!! Always complaining with "what other time do i have to play?".. Kana sai!! Hey!! Listen up bugger!! My entire course has got to do with computers and i dun wanna hear this shit from you abt playing the comp.. U can juz SHUT THE CRAP UP and throw away ur maple accnt!! Oh crap.. its ruining ur life..
Imean, who is so addicted to maple to play it from 8.00pm to 7.00 am the nxt day!! ITS SIBEI SIAO!!
Alright, my bro has got some serious issues.. Just yesterday i checked thru his hp msg inbox and found out ot my horror that all those times he has been telling my parents that he has been gg to do projects with his friends weren't true!!
CRAP!! U know where he go or not?? He make friends in maple and arranged to meet up with them in lan shops in places like taman jurong and lakeside just too trade Maple Credits for cash!! WAH LIAO EHX!! Somemore those ppl are strangers siah!! Worse still horx, is my dad fetch him by car to these places thinking that he has was gg to do projects with his friends.. #&$#&$#$%$#!!! One of these days i gg to get my bro for this..
Edited: My bro pretended to be sick this morning just so tht he dun nid to go sch.. Worse thing was, his acting was so FAKE.. pretend to cough also dunno how to do.. when i was still in my bed, i was like.. -----> -.-" .. Somemore, my dad actually believed himl, go and give him money to see doctor.. WAH LIAO EHX.. What is this world coming to!! Then, when my dad left for work, , i was preparing to go to sch when my bro just jumped out of his bed and said "How was my acting?" #$#$%@%#%&@%!!! Hey bugger.. i know u want to play maple story right? But dun have to go to such an exent yeah?? Hid all the power cords from both comps at home.. But it still didn't stop him.. (At 1.00pm , my bro went off to cyber active (West Mall) to buy another one.. )
Now playing: The Corbans - Strength
Full Lyrics:
"Dear friends take comfort
In the joy you receive
To those still searching
For a truth to believe
I know a hope that saves
The weak and the lost
A man that saves
By the wood of a cross
I am not afraid to say
I live for Christ
His name will separate
The men from the mice
Be bold, Be strong
In the praise from your lips
These words are everything
You don't want to miss
Stand up and shout it
If you know how I feel
This song of strength
Makes me feel so unreal
To the Lord alone
Our praises we sing
I'm proud to admit
That I feel like a king
That I feel like a king
I hope the Spirit finds you
Strong in the faith
To those still searching
For the path of the saints
Your sin can vanish
From the depth of your souls
Redemption is found
In the blood of the Lord
In the blood of the Lord"
Alright..doing some late night blogging.. (well actually it should be considered early morning blogging coz its 13 mins past 12.00..)
Hmm.. suddenly as i was gg through all my cellgrp's blogs.. i just realised that not many ppl actually had the discipline to blog and keep their postings updated.. which means -----> my blog is so special!! wahahah!! LOLX.. not that i want to be proud or anything..
Also i realsied that my blog is one of those "controversial" blogs being viewed ard my church peeps.. Well, the catch is ------> I have NVR told any church member my blog add!! But, the thing is... some "secret source" found my blog add, and now its been circulating ard the church like crazy!! (if i find that "secret source" .. not sure if i will scold that person or just forgive him/her..)
Just recently, i found out that the most unlikely ppl in church to view my blog have viewed my blog!! OH MY GOSH!! I mean if ppl who knew me in church read my blog, (like those bb or gb members or maybe even the church pastors or the church workers) i still can tolerate.. but then, suddenly.. its like everybody who views my blog thinks they know what i am gg thru and then starts to give opinions.. comments.. advice.. encouragement.. etc.. and i am like.. -.-"
Do u guys know me well?? I know u ppl may betrying to help or sth but PLS LORX!! Reading my blog is and commenting abt my postings is not the way!!
Alrite.. i also found out that i have been irregular with following up with my postings.. like.. i did write abt certain problems i am facign in my life but when i had solved it, i didn't blog it down.. so, it caused a lot of misunderstanding as well.. my bad..
So, Alrite.. just wanna clarify a few things...
1. I am now back in the body of christ.. in cosbt and in aspiration.. (my new cel...l) I now know the reason for believing and i can tell you that if it was not for the Singapore Polytechnic Campus Crusade For Christ, i would have still been living that miserable and empty life.. (Spccc can be good ok!!)
2. I have learnt how to deal with BGR'S.. God has already arranged a special someone for each of us in our lives.. And well, we just need to follow god's plan and that god will show us who that special someone is..
Well, if u experience strong feelings for a certain person, it may not be the person god wants you to be with.. Remember that you may just be experiencing infatuation.. (dunno pls go and check the dictionary..)
Also... note to all christians.. christians having bgr's with non-chrstians is wrong!! It creates lots of problems and may also undermine ur faith in the process..
Well, also, if u feel strongly that a person is ur special someone, pls pray to god and ask first.. Do quiet time and ask god to speak to you if its true.. Ok, dun anyhow have bgr's as if its a play thing.. Ok.. even though the world treats bgr's like a play thing, we are not to follow this world..
Lastly.. pls go and read the bible on what love is defined as.. i lazy to find the bible chpt but all you chrstians should know what i mean..
3. I am currently growing in faith in many areas and i am not living for this world.. (as some of you church ppl might suggest) i know that you guys may think that having bling or having long hair dyed hair might give bad impressions to others.. But pls take note that the bible said that we should not follow the ACTIONS of this world.. The dye hair long hair etc thing is just our own personal preference!! its our own personal tastes!! Ok!! (Just like applying make up..) God created us all to be different and u dun expect everyone to sport a a buzz cut.. (A lot of us won't look nice with a buzz cut..)
And well, another thing i want to add is that if u ppl see any christian trying to act like others.. pls take note that it may not because they want to fit in desperately with others.. they may just actually want to make themselves part of the crowd so that they can reach out to them.. I know that some pastors actually go to pubs to drink beer with others with the purpose of reaching out to them.. BUT.. it does not mean that they are drunkards or anything!! When they drink beer, they are still loving god!! Jesus also drank wine with the tax-collectors to reach out to them ok!!
And well,remember the 2 greatest commandments we christians need to follow?!?!
1.Love the lord your god with all your heart..
2.Love thy neighbour as yourself..
So it does not mean that if christians start to follow others.. we are like starting to be like the world.. RUBBISH!! If we still love god and are working towards fufilling the great comission, there's no point stopping us!!
Yesterday morning i couldn't help out with my campus crusade surveys as i had to do lots of my projects.. Well, i left house early in the afternoon to head for cell.. went past westmall to take bus 852 at the interchange.. Well, as i was walking to the traffic light that is btwn the interchange and the mrt station, i saw 2 gilrs in sch uniforms trying to get donations.. Well, if i'm not wrong, i *tink* they were hillgrovians coz if i not wrong i saw them wearing green uniform.. Well, i looked at them and i was considering donating.. Well, i decided not to as i was apprroaching the traffic light as i was too lazy mahx.. Erm.. i think the 2 girls read my mind as they kept on whispering and pointing at me after i turned my head away and then suddenly, one of the girls rushed up to me and said.. "Gor Gor.. Ke yi bang wo men juan qian mah?" in the sweetest voice possible.. Then i was like.. er... er..er.. I was a sucker for such requests siah and i just took out a coin from my hand and dropped it into her tin can.. *shakes head and sighs*
Hmm.. that sheltered stretch leading to the bkt batok bus interchange is known to me as a "rip off" area.. Why ah? Coz everytime you can always find street buskers, old aunties selling tissues, the occasional disabled person asking for money, street vendors selling fruits and chesnuts and the usual men's magazines , or even ppl selling curry puffs in the most unsanitary conditions..
Well, met a poly course mate along the way to the bus.. said hi..
Hmm.. today (sunday) i went to see the doctor again.. well the doc said that if i haven't fully recovered in 5 days i should go back and see the doctor again.. the queue was so long again!! Much longer!! My queue number was 28 but the paitient seeing the doctor was 18!! Arrggghh!! Slept most of the time in the clinic.. read a few boring magazines.. until finally it was my turn to see the doctor.. (got more antibiotics..)
Next, went to westmall to exchange a few t-shirts plus buy a new pair of jeans.. then went to exchange some money at the money changer in westmall.. Well, breadtalk, which was opposite the money changer, was playing techno.. usually it didn't play any music but this time, it did.. And, the techno was HORRIBLE!! I should know best as i have been collecting techno for so long!! It was just another one of those techno songs trying to be hard and heavy but it turns out it wasn't as distinct as other crowd favourites.. juz seemed to be as "ANOTHER LAME TECHNO SONG"... No lyrics somemore.. aiyoz..
Ok, went to IMM nxt.. but as i was gg to IMM, i saw this saloon driving past.. and well er.. they had car stickons that kept saying things like we love god or jesus saves.. Ok.. the only other vehicle that i have seen so far with a more prominent christian msg was the church van.. On the church van got some huge red words on the left saying JESUS LOVES YOU.. alright.. i mean that van is always either in my sec sch compound or the church building.. So, i guess its rather safe.. But then the saloon is like dangerous siah!! I mean, the family inside also have small kids lehx!! And then, driving ur car and parking it all ard Singapore is only finding trouble with others.. Sorry ah.. not that i want to criticise u ppl for putting up such stickers.. but what if scully u ppl park ur car in some shopping centre and then come back to find all the windscreens smashed to pieces.. or worse still, ur car gets burned down to the ground?? Hah.. this made me think of what if that saloon was in another country that opposes christianity.. Hah.. if that car was in Indonesia or maybe even Norway right now, the car insurance confirm good game liao lorx.. The car is like a walking advetisement saying -----> "Please damage my car.. Have fun!! =)" LOLX.. Alright, in IMM i bought more jeans in an even cheaper sale.. bought a few pairs of shirts.. had my hair ----> "trimmed".. The hairstylist was quite good.. she knew my tastes completely..At first, i was cursing that i couldn't get the male hairstylist to trim my hair.. coz its according to the queue wadz.. (Male hairstylists usually understand my hair btr than females..) But in the end, i was so happy!! =)
Hah.. what is the world coming too.. good hairstylists i also feel so happy..
Alright.. went home nxt.. still have new shoes to buy..
I'm not really sure if i hsould get sport shoes or just sneakers... But, i still have 80 dollars and i guess the shoes will have to wait.. i'm just too busy to get them.. i'll just have to drop by queensway shopping centre sometime soon bah..
Now playing: Daniel Bedingfield - If you're not the one
Sneak Lyrics:
"I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms"
Poly open house was from thursday to saturday, and almost the entire crusade was mobilised to help out with its recruitment exercise.. the reason why we were so desperate this year was because all the poly-enrollments for Sp this year will be done online. So, we went around giving out surveys to all the post-secondary students..
The surveys are quite simple lah! Like.. what course do you wish to take in Sp or would you wish to come if we organise activities fro you in march.. then also got another question that says.. did u know that sp is the top poly to offer a game designing diploma? Er.. i mean.. my course IT 3rd yr students got a choice to do game design.. But i can tell u, its impossible to get in!! Out of maybe 200+ places in IT, only 20 places are reserved for it!! And only the best of the best programmers in our IT course enter it!! out surveys to all the post-secondary students..
Well, theres a seperate course called game design though.. But the problem is, how many ppl are gg to enter the course to expeirnece game design before regretting it.. Game design is ALL abt programming siah.. A lot of gaming freaks juz dun seem to realise tht.. Juz keep patronising all those lan shops and gaming arcades with all their parents hard earned money..
Alright, we were banking very much on the last question in the survey, just below the particulars section.. And that was.. what religion are you? Well, that was the most impt..
Hmm.. on friday i got the shock of my life.. Well, 2 shocks actually.. On thursday i realised that i haven't submitted my mc for tuesday to the admin office.. So at night i searched the whole house like siao, only to realise that the mc was in a small plastic bag which my mum threw away.. SHIT.. Ok, i went to the clinic to ask for another one, but they said they could only write a letter instead.. So, i was like ok.. just wite one siah.. But the doc was too busy and so i was asked to come back at ard 10..Came back tht time but the doc was still busy, so i was told to come back on fri morning.. Well, i went to sch first, before skipping alessonwhich was on frm 10 to 12 to rush back to get the letter.. Than, i rushed back for my gems lessons at 1 before heading back to the biz blk to submit my mc.. But when i went into the admin office, they said that mc's that are past 48hrs cannot be submitted!! Arrgghhh!!!
Alright.. the 2nd shock.. i had this classmate from sec sch who is now studying in Sp also.. Well, he grew very long permed hair in poly (up till his shoulders) and even had it dyed brown.. Well, on friday, he shocked me at the dover mrt busstop when he spotted an almost clean shaven haircut!! I was like ----> OH MY GOSH!! And , he was wearing my sec sch pe t-shirt and also my sec sch long pants!! THis made me wonder if he wanted to go for the open house looking like a sec sch student again.. -.-" I mean, if he wanted the open house freebies (i'm not saying thats why he cut his hair) he shouldn't have gone to such an extent..
Hmm.. well, had my gen12 ii teammeeting on friday evening.. We were all given our team newsletters.. Well, we are to go ask ard for support.. I'm currently doing so.. =)
Now playing: Casting Crowns - Praise you in this storm
Sneak lyrics:
"And i'll praise you in this storm
and i will lift my hands
that you are who you are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
you hold in your hand
you never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise you in this storm"
Artist: RoccoTitle: Generation Of Love (Single Version)
We are the generation of love,
This is the time for higher emotion,
We are the generation of love,
This is the night for love devotion,
We are the generation of love,
This is the time for higher emotion,
We are the generation of love,
This is the night for love devotion,
For love devotion.
Come and dance. (x2)
Bad, bad boy.
Na-na-na-naaa-na-na,
Na-na-na-naa-naa-naa-na-na-na,
Na-na-na-naaa-na-na,
Na-na-na-naa-naa-naa-na-na-na,
We are the generation of love,
This is the time for higher emotion,
We are the generation of love,
This is the night for love devotion,
For love devotion.
We are the generation of love,
This is the time for higher emotion,
We are the generation of love,
This is the night for love devotion,
For love devotion.
Na-na-na-naaa-na-na,
Na-na-na-naa-naa-naa-na-na-na,
Na-na-na-naaa-na-na,
Na-na-na-naa-naa-naa-na-na-na.
Well, i guess so..
Now playing: Groove Coverage - Runaway
Sneak Lyrics:
"I wannna know the strength of your heart
why did you tell my broken soul and heart
is it a dream or mayority
loved and without after warranty"
Today i got owned.. losing my voice fast..
Well, i got advice form some ppl that i should fast and pray to god bout deliverance from temptation.. But the thing is.. i am sick!! I need food or else i can't take my medicine!!
If i don't blog my emotions down, i think they will just keep bottling up and i might explode one day.. well, i know i'm just a friend, and well, i know i'll probably never express my feelings.. i'll just leave it this way then.. i know i will most probably face the "wrath" of a few seniors should i do otherwise.. But, the main reason is that i need to concentrate on spreading god's message..there's just no time for anything else.. But some part of me always seems to rebel with what is supposed to be right..
Some part of me just screams out that i am doing injustice to myself.. that others can choose to accept bgr's while i have no choice but to reject it.. Well, those "others" always seemed to me as never at fault..whatever they do just seems to be so right.. I just wonder if they have they ever stopped to listen to other ppl's views over their lives!! Why issit that when they (or other ppl) comment abt me, its just so easy and the whole world just doesn't seem to care.. When they hurt me in certain ways, all they need to do is just apologise insincerely and they are free to get on with their lives.. But when i hurt them, or when i try to have my own opinions, the world suddenly turns against me.. And why issit that they are allowed to do certain things but i can't.. I mean everyone keeps saying to have big dreams.. but my dreams are just supressed coz ppl always have this negative view that i am not ready..thats judging me right?? its just sibei unfair!!
I mean, its almost as if they can do certain things that are controversial, but i can't coz i am not "mature enough" or sth.. and when they make lots of mistakes, everybody is so quick to forgive them, but if i made the same mistakes, its just prove that i am not fit to do those controversial things.. Why so prejudice siah!! Why so stuck up!! Why so unforgiving!! ( Hey i can be a bit exaggerative at times causing alarm to ppl reading my blog.. a word of advice ---> "chill"..) When i talk about controversial things, i mean things such as voicing views on others, bgr, etc..
[Hmm.. some ppl who read this post have asked if i am angry over leadership.. well, nope.. haha just angry over a few stuck up ppl.. must learn to forgive them though.. =P]
Sure.. i will get over this.. its just a matter of time..
i know that there's some sacrifices involved..
Oh man.. i seem to be giving a lot of ppl the wrong msgs everytime they read my blog.. haha.. so lets clarify things..
1. Sometimes i am not as angst filled as my postings suggest.. i just like to be a bit overly dramatic..
2. More often than not, these postings are just for my own personal reference and i when i write them i know a lot of ppl will not understand.. so pls dun anyhow comment.. ask me first..
3. My postings do not need to make any sense.. i mean this is not a commercial publication where everything must mean sth to the reader..
4. You may not understand me better thru my postings.. coz i may be happy right now, but in my blog u may think i'm not.. =P
5. Blogging to me is like a form of release of stress.. so hmm..
6. I'm starting to write a lot of nonsense.. forgive me if i do so.. too stressed lately.. and its like if i can't even have freedom over what i post in my blog, then siao liao lah!! Next moment ppl will be reading my mind.. =P
Now playing: piece of heaven - akira
Sneak Lyrics:
"The minute you walked through my door
I know this love is forever more
But then you told my all these lies
See the tears filling up my eyes"
Went to the crusade room soon after to take my cough medicine.. Well, stayed dere for a while before deciding to head back to the buisness blk.. Well, the rest of the events up till the time i came home i shall not say.. I just want to say that i feel its hopeless to have a relationship.. I just wanna torture myself until the feeling passes.. and i can tell you, its very painful.. (do look for clues in my blog..) Now playing: DJ digress - Follow up Sneak Lyrics: "This is the f... (x 5) This is the (x 7) This is the follow up (follow up) This is the f... (x 6) This is the follow up"Well, woke up feeling quite faint today, and i wanted very much just to stay in bed.. but the thought of finally seeing her school just made me wanna go to sch a.s.a.p..
i mean..this is crazy.. i never wanted to have such emotions.. but now that i have them, shit.. i just can't get them out of my head..
Alright.. i wasn't fit to go to school.. but i just wanted to see her.. (actually main reason was to go for clm lah..) i mean, this is so weird and crazy.. Why can't i just wish this emotions out of me?
Well, my classmates, most of them were wondering why i went to school when i should have been staying at home resting.. i didn't tell them why.. but my eyes kept looking around and searching..
Well, when finally it was time for my lunch break at a certain foodcourt, i kept seeing her.. and i can tell you, i was like arrgghh!! Just don't let me have any mixed emotions lah!!
Alright.. after the lunch break i went for class.. but i told the cher that i wasn't feeling so well and i wanted to go home.. Also, she was taking my cd class later in the day and my grp had not come out with any slides for presenting our project.. So i asked the cher if she could let off my grp coz i was too sick to present anything.. Well, she agreed and with that, i saved my cd grp.. =P
Well, i asked the cher if the lesson she was teaching was very impt and she said yes.. so i decided to stay on and listen.. but, i couldn't pay attention at all and i just kept coughing and sneezing away.. i guess i was doing more harm than good as i felt i was disturbing the entire class. so halfway thru the lesson, i just packed my bag and left thru the back door of the classroom..
After suffering the first half of the day with the IDEAS presentation, i decided to do blogging in salc before heading straight to the crusade room.. i went down to buy some food from the noodle shop to eat.. Well, i accidentally put pepper in my noodles before realsing that i was sick.. and i was like oh my gosh!!
Alright, ate in the crusade room before deciding to study in dere.. but yeah, i was far too tired and i slowly drifted off to sleep.. Well, after my long afternoon nap, i went to class.. Well, i kept coughing during the entire lesson and even though a few of my classmates and the teacher asked me to go home and rest, i was like so stubborn.. i just wanted to stay on.. well, i payed the price where 3 times during the lesson i had to rush to the toilet to cough and cough..
Also, during the last part of the lesson, i jut couldn't pay attention the the lecturer and i just wished to lesson would end sooner.. after the lesson, i headed to the crusade room..
Well, today as i was walking back home from the crusade room, i was feeling very sick.. and as i was walking towards the mrt, i kept coughing and i almost vomited.. Oh man.. well, when i got home, my mum told me to go see a doctor and not delay.. She said that its not worth saving the money to see the doctor if my condition just keeps getting worse.. Also, my house already run out of cough medicine.. so , bo bian.. have to go.. Alright, i brought my textbook along to study at the clinic.. it was a very long queue.. My queue no was 20 but the doctor was still taking patient no 13.. -.-"
Alright.. at least the tv in the clinic was on.. Hmm.. its tht show where bryan wong and mark lee challenge each other to see who has better home furnishing skills.. what was that show called again? hmm.. well, bryan won.. (as usual) and its like almost every episode i see of that show bryan always wins.. hah.. at the end of the show, (mark lee was strangling bryan wong..) =P
Hmm.. when it came to the 19 paitient.. a little boy.. well, he acted very smug and proud and gave me a very irritating face.. i tried to tolerate him.. But when he opened the door to the doctors office, he tried to act very gentlemanly and even asked his mum to enter the room first.. Then, when hi mum was opening the door, he hopped into the room.. almost as if he was trying to win the doctor over..his actions were kinda sick..
Well, the mum and child took like 10 whole mins just to come out of the room.. Wah.. here i was in the clinic coughing like mad and here they were taking their time.. Somemore the little boy looked so healthy to me.. After he came out of the doctors office, he was still jumping around with joy.. Alright, i soon found out that the doctors in clinics now charge consultation fees also according to time spent witht the patient.. So i guess the doctor was more than happy to stay on with his "foolish" patient and his mum..
Well, it was finally my turn to see the doctor.. Alright, i told him what conditions i had and well he asked me to describe to him what kind of cough i had.. Well, i really did more describing than normal.. I kept coughing in his presence and yeah, he could take a hint.. Well, in the end, he diagnosed me with having a throat infection and also lots of phlegm and i should take an mc.. But i protested siah!! I told him i wanted to go to school.. (doesn't sound like normal school students right?) hah.. no lah.. its coz tuesday i got clm (campus life meeting) and i dun wish to miss it.. for several good reasons.. =P
Hmm.. he gave me non-drowsy medicine and still gave me an mc.. Well, it was up to me if i wanted to turn up in school.. But i kept telling myself that no matter what happens, i will still turn up for school, and for clm..
Now playing: Angel City - Do you know
Sneal lyrics:
Do you know
Don't look back on yesterday
I believe we can find a way
Don't let hopes and dreams fade
Don't hesitate it's not too late
Yesterday morning i woke up coughing and coughing.. well, it seemed that i had fallen sick.. well, i had sore throat and as i tried to study, i just couldn't concentrate.. Every now and then i was coughing away..Oh my.. i feel i'm starting get sick more regularly.. ok, when i went to talk to my dad, it was like my voice had totally changed.. i sounded more like croaking and i had to repeat what i wanted to say many many times before my dad could understand me.. My mum as well..
Well, my mum came to the rescue again.. gave me some cough syrup to drink.. Well, it worked.. and for the entire sunday afternoon i went out with my friends without coughing..
But, when i came back home, i started coughing again..
Hmm.. today i had my IDEAS presentation.. and, my throat hurt badly!! i was struggling to talk and thankfully, i didn't cough during the presentation.. Well, after trying to say out my slides during the presentation was like torture..my voice also sounded different.. After the presentation, when we set down and waited for another group to finish presenting, i kept coughing even though i was trying my best to control myself.. I'm now blogging in the SALC and i have bought a bottle of mineral water.. not sure how long its goingg to last but i am still coughing away.. sigh..
Well, today i aslo woke up wiht a splitting headache.. everytime i tried to move my head, it hurt!! The feeling was almost as if i kept bobbing my head up and down for an entire night in a dance club.. And its like i can't keep moving my head or i'll feel terrible.. I need panadol lah!! I better rush over to the shop at the mrt station to buy some panadol..
Hmm.. yesterday i went to search for some backmasking websites that showed the music and lyrics of certain songs that were supposed to contain satanic meanings when played backwards.. Well, there were many many songs that were found to contain such meanings and i was quite spooked aFter hearing those songs backwards.. So, i began praying to the lord and well, i felt
much better after that..
Well, i also prayed for the lord to show me how i should deal with relationships.. i also prayed for the lord to show me if i should wait.. Well, i have this feeling that the lord wants me to free mYself from such distractions and wait for the right moment..
I will continue to pray and ask god what he'll have me do..
Now playing: Sonic flood - Lord i lift your name on high
Sneak lyrics:
"You came from Heaven to earth
To show the way
From the earth to the cross
My debt to pay
From the cross to the grave
From the grave to the sky
Lord I lift Your name on high"
Well, this is kinda funny.. taken from the talkingcock.com website.. =) How You Are In Love The Keys to Your Heart
Are our neighbours going apeshit after watching too many fake Kong DVDs, or could there be plausible reasons why they're now spotting sasquatches? Here are some reasons why Bigfoot might actually be living in JB:
1. The beauty ‘saloons’ there give really cheap haircuts
2. They’re the grandchildren of Ann Darrow and King Kong. En route back to New York from Skull Island (remember, they said it was near Singapore), they stopped by JB to pick up some cheap DVDs and got romantic at the Holiday Inn… (Eh, anything is possible when you believe in giant apes!)
3. Either that or someone got a bit too friendly with the local orangutans.
4. JB is so good at copying American DVDs, so why shouldn’t they be able to copy American mythical creatures too?
5. The JB Tourism Authorities just couldn’t find a mascot weird enough to compete with the Merlion.
6. JB oreddy got First Link and Second Link, so why not Missing Link also?
You tend to give more than take in relationships.
You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time.
You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.
You are fickle and tend to fall out of love easily. You bounce from romance to romance.How Are You In Love?
Hmm.. well its kinda true.. but wait till u see the next test.. =)
In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.
You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.
Your ideal relationship is traditional. Without saying anything, both of you communicate with your hearts.
Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.
You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.
In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.What Are The Keys To Your Heart?Alright.. i just didn't feel that blogthings.com was very accurate but surprisingly, when i took this test, it was EXACTLY WHAT I WAS!!! OH MY GOSH!!
I just dunno why.. i really don't.. all along i have always wanted to free myself from any relationships.. i just wanted to concentrate on God's work.. But its just that this semester i am starting to like someone.. Someone i've known since last semester.. I know its weird but somehow i am torn between 2 worlds.. I am really confused.. And that person just seems to care a lot everytime we talk (and its been days since we last talked..) and i am now quite frustrated deep inside.. Do i really want to take that path again?
Why is it just so difficult to free from relationships.. I really don't have that much time for such things.. And i really like my life right now.. Carefree and happy go lucky.. But no matter how hard i try to stop such temptations, It just seems to come back at me with an even greater force.. Christians don't lose hope.. But, i think i am losing hope..
I really should start praying if this is the path that the lord wants me to go.. I don't really know if she has the same feelings as me, but i know i may never be good enough for her.. And the truth hurts alot..
Something tells me that i should just carry on with life.. but something also tells me that i may live to regret it.. I am really so confused.. I just don't have the time or maybe even enough experience to have a relationship.. I don't think i am good enough for anyone.. So why do i feel this way?
Oh lord.. pls show me why i am feeling such strong emotions.. I just don't wish to let such emotions take over my life and prevent me and her from carrying out your mighty works..
But then again.. if its the lord's decision and his will.. Who am i to change that??
I know i am not close to her currently and i have made many mistakes in our friendship.. But, why do i still feel this way.. Sometimes i just feel that its easier to approach other people than her.. I think its because my emotions are controlling me.. Will i regret this? Does she know that i have feelings for her? Does she have feelings for me too?
Why do i care so much for her.. I feel so troubled by the answer to my question.. I just don't understand.. I think she likes someone else already.. ( i definitely think so) So, if she does, then isn't it foolish to just keep wasting my time thinking of her? Is this love?
Oh lord.. i'm so confused.. Pls show me the path you wish me to take..
Its now time to reflect on the past year and to come up with the most memorable events of the year...I have come up with a most popular list as seen in my own eyes.. =P
Most weird flyer seen in Singapore :
West Mall..At the 2 wooden doors dere got a few pieces of papers tht write "Please push gently"..its still dere..
Comments: (juz makes me so tempted to give the doors a hard kick..)
Understatement of the year:
Obviously it had to come from a Singaporean.. And, the award goes to ... *drum roll*...Johnny of the radio show "Zhng my car".. Downloadable at www.mrbrown.com Well, i liked his catch phrase so much that i just had to place it in the no 1 spot.. And, his catch phrase was... "I like techno.. Techno good.." ahahaha..
Most popular Singapore website:
And the winner.. For dunno how many consecutive years goes to .. TALKINGCOCK. COM!! Can be viewed at.. www.talkingcock.com Please use ie explorer 6 or higher for the best viewing experience.. WARNING.. Certain material in the website may not be suitable for the viewing of children.. Parents, please be warned..
Most popular fashion trend:
This year, it goes to the colourful bands seen on almost every teens wrists.. Apparently, it has surived through being out of trend for an entire year!! Keep it up!!
More to be added soon..Do wait for the changes in this blog..
Ok.. i have changed over 3 blog skins in 1 hr.. Happy with this for now.. Well, i hope to have a better blog skin by nxt week.. i hope*
Ok.. this entire week was extremely stressful.. I dunno why but i always sleep at 12-1 o clock at night and everytime i take bus 106 home, ppl always have to wake me up when we reach the bkt batok interchange.
Shit.. 2 of my exam paper results werre released this week.. Opsy and Netf... Well, techincally i have improved.. Last sem i was getting like 20+ marks? 30+ marks? And all is like last in class or 2nd last in class.. But now, i am passing my exams!! WOooHoOo!! I got 52 marks for my Opsy..The result of hardwork and peserverance.. =) But got ppl i know get like 90+ marks.. Wah liao!! And then, my netf got 49.5.. T_T But, round off is still 50 right? Pass lah.. ahahaha.. I better not lie to myself.. =P
Hmm.. just this week i fixed my mp3 at creative hq.. Well, they gave me a new mp3 coz my old one was "beyond repair".. Or thts what they say.. -.-" Hmm.. i forgot to back up my files.. SHIT.. But lucky, i got put bits and pieces of my files everwhere in my 2 comps at home.. The music files i also have in my home comps.. But the worst thing was, i didn't back up my web publishing assignment and i had to redo it all over again!! All my hard work down the drain!! Arrgghh!! Well, i also didn't back up my Visual Basic test in my mp3.. So if the diskette i pass to cher cannot run then i dun have another copy to pass to cher!! Siao Liao Lah!!! Prays tht the diskette can work!! (Last sem my diskette couldn't work.. so if this sem cannot then.. er.. Straits times headlines.. "A Singapore Polytechnic IT student has jumped to his death from the 25th floor of his blk because he knew he was gg to fail his Vbas asasignment" =P.. jkjk..
Also, yesterday during my cca dg, we went to play badminton.. Ok,actually i wanted to go home coz i was really sibei tired but i still stayed on.. my efforts payed off!! i was searching the crusade cabinet for badminton rackets but i found none.. But instead, i found the brown colour campus crusade t-shirt tht i was searchhing all over for!! Last time i asked everyone if tht t-shirt was still selling but they all said tht there was no more stock and they were not gg to make anymore of tt shirt.. But, hey, i found a L size of tht t-shirt inside the crusade cabinet!! I quickly grabbed it siah!! Then i called the crusade treasurer and asked if the shirt was reserved.. She said no..And those were the magic words.. I hurriedly took out 7 dollars from my wallet without thinking and stuffed it into the treasurers pigeon hole..Well, ltr when my dgl searched the cabinet a 2nd time, he found a usable badminton racket.. then scold me say i am blind siah.. but nvm.. at least i saw the t-shirt tht i was dying to have..I tink i acting like a bit desperate siah.. =P Today, i a bit kiasu.. Wearing tht t-shirt to sch juz to make sure tht it is not reserved.. Coz if it is reserved, i dun tink anyone would want to buy tht t-shirt when it is already worn by somebody else right.. ahah.. =)
Hmm.. now i feel very sianz.. I rushed to sch frm home on friday.. today lah.. coz i thought today got opsy lesson.. I even brought my heavy opsy book with me.. When i reach t17, i realised tht cher already canceled the lesson last week and gave us a makeup this monday liao.. SHIT.. i am so blur.. Well, i knew tht i was suppose to have IDEAS grp meeting at tht time.. So i tried to call my grp members.. But in the end, Siao Liao lah!! My hp low batt and switched off!! What else can go wrong siah!! So in the end i decided to go to my crusade room to hang.. But, no one was inside!! I was alone!! Crap!! Then i decided to take out my mp3 and also my can drink to start chilling.. But then i realised i had no earphones!! My earphones all spoiled by my younger brother liao.. Then the earphones tht i had been using was borrowed frm a classmate. who had taken the earphones back yesterday.. So now i was like ----> -.-" What a day.. My mp3 last time not working but my earphones were working.. So couldn'yt listen to my music.. Now, my mp3 is working but my earphones not working.. So now still cannot lisaten to mp3.. =( And also, those gd quality earpghones are like so expensive..ard $50 dollars!! And, i am currently broke!! my expenses are killing me!! Arrgghhh!!
So in the end, i decided to go salc to play comp games and blog lorx.. Haixx.. ltr 1 O'clock still got gems.. sianz!!!
I'M CURRENTLY UPDATING MY BLOG.. ITS STILL UNDER CONSTRUCTION, AND ALL MY BLOG CODES ARE IN A HUGE MESS.. I REALLY NEED HELP.. =(
Isaac ying spins tunes as
DJ DARKANGEL
This t-shirt is part of an auction done by the Cat Welfare Society Singapore.. And well, guess who signed this t-shirt? Cyndi Wang.. haha.. sure a lot of bidders for this t-shirt..
Today starts my MASSIVE DEFAMEMENT of the new director of SMA..
U know ah.. This **** used to be the director of SAA in Sp.. Well, my dad is actually very well liked in SMA.. Even the technicians at SMA respect him greatly.. Well, if u have noticed, my dad is the assistant director of SMA.. Well, he was so pissed with **** taking the new position as Director even though he has lesser qualifications.. If u dun believe that **** has lesser qualifications, u can go and see for yourself.. This is taken direct from the SMA website and it shows clearly.. My dad has more qualifications that that guy lehx!!
Director
**** , BSc (Hons) Maritime Commerce, MBA (Lancaster), MMIS
Deputy Directors
Marketing & Industry Services
Ying Hing Leong, Tech Dip (Marine), First Class Engineer (Motor), BSc (Computer Science), MSNAMES
Course Management
**** , Master (FG), MSc (Maritime Mgmt), MSNI
But then wah lau ehx. **** use some kind of political connection with the principal to get his new position as the Director of SMA.. He was quite close to the principal and so the principal gave him the job.. **** also used alecturer who didn't like my dad to go against him by calling in some political grouping to step in.. Afraid that things might go to the press, the principal quietly gave the job to****.. I really hate that guy lehx.. Apparently, there was this lecturer under the supervision of my father. But he was very lazy and didn't do his job properly. So, my dad refused to reccomend him for a pay rise.. As a result, that lecturer has always been mad at my father..
Well, my dad has resigned from his job as Deputy Director.. To tell you the truth, many lecturers in SMA have already resigned coz there is too much politics at work now.. And, my dad quit also for anther reason.. U see ah, that **** isn't as qualified right? So anything he doesn't know how to manage he will just push to my dad to do.. And he gets all the credit for it..
I tell u, this is so UNFAIR.. Somemore, that **** clamis to be a staunch Christian.. Yeah right.. A staunch Christian will just anyhow backstab ppl for his job.. *pukes*
Somemore, the former director of SMA already said that my dad would be the new director of SMA.. Did u know that my dad helped build up SMA alot.. For more than 13 over years, he has leped grow SMA like mad..He also taught taufik before.. ahahaha.. =P
To further my prove that my dad is indeed more qualified to take on the position of director, please look at my dads qualification list.. He is a First Class marine engineer.. (that is like the best of the best marine engineer qualification in Singapore..) last time before he became a lecturer in Sp, he was one of the best Marine Engineers in Singapore.. and he was earning 8 times what he is earning now.. But he became a lecturer to have more time with his family.. Did u know that Marine Engineers only return to Singapore once every 6 months??
But nowadays, my dad seems quite affected by what has happened in SMA.. he has been drinking more often and also golfing alot with friends overseas.. I still remembered how he was so crazy as to fly to shanghai just to play golf with his friend on buisness there.. And, everytime he asked me if i had eaten, and i replied that i had eaten in Sp, he would get upset.. Basically, the mere mention of Sp is enough to cause him to feel very upset.. Also, during the few months where he was staying in Sp after resignation to allow the principal to find a new assistant dorector, he kept staying at home more often and was always very unwilling to go to School.. I guess it really did a great damage to his ego.. Well, in every school in Sp, hardy anyone knows the name of the asst-director.. They only know the directors name.. Well, it so happens that the director of the campus crusade for christ in Singapore is also called ****.. So when i heard of this, i mistook both of them to be the same person and i almost vomited.. lol.. Also, when i went to the SMA website a few months ago to view the directors message, it sounded so fake..I wanted to vomit on the spot..
Hmm.. the only reason why i feel so safe posting this is coz my dad has already resigned form his job and is now working for another big shipping company in Singapore.. Lolyds register.. Well, wish him luck there.. Anyways, **** is getting his just desserts.. Because he knows so little abt maritime, he is now being hated by almost every single students in SMA.. I know coz a few of my friends are from SMA and they tell me that they all dun like him alot.. They are also suspicious on how come he was once director of SAA and then he just suddenly jump position to Director of SMA.. Today is also officially my dad's last day in Sp.. Over this week, he has been making regular trips to Sp to collect all his stuff from his office and relocating it to his new office.. I will miss that office.. I used to go inside there as a yound kid.. And, i will miss all my dad's colleagues in SMA.. Used to drop visits to them when i still wasn't a student in Sp..
I have tried talking this over with my crusade staff and friends.. Well, they told me to forgive him.. even though he is clearly a christian who wants to be seen and is not acting the christian way.. Well, i am trying hard to do so.. But, if he ever comes to support the campus crusade in Sp, i will be SO mad.. He doesn't deserve to be called a Christian LAH!!
Lyrics of Demon Hunter.. Surprisingly, a Christian band..
Artist: Demon Hunter
Album: Summer Of Darkness
Track: Anihilate The Corrupt
Behind the eyes of my compassion lies a suffering soul
And in my blood a bitter darkness slowly taking it's toll
I feel the death of our connection and the fading of light
Between the shards of sudden panic from choking on my life
I see the scars of your addiction and the feeling you hide
A blackened heart from all the hatred you will never rewind
Within the depths of your depression hear you pleading for help
Your just a shell of vacant ruin, a portrait of myself.
I can't breathe alone
You can guide me home.
CHORUS:I am the face of your affliction.
Feeding new life through the cracks in your skull.
Beneath the skin of your aggression is a thickening fear
A swelling plague from every devastating voice that you hear
You feel the throes of contradiction in the world that you left
Another day in your delusion, the never-ending death.
I can't breathe alone
You can guide me home
I can feel you here
You can draw me near
CHORUS:I am the face of your afflication.
Feeding new life through the cracks in your skull.
I am the pain of your conviction
Stabbing you right through the back of your soul.
This is life, this is love
(CHORUS)I can feel you here
You can draw me near.
Artist: P.O.D.
Album: Snuff The Punk
Track:
Three In The Power Of One
Souls black as
But it's nothing for the children of God to fight
We wrestle not with flesh and blood
But with the principalities of darkness
So put on your armor of God
For the day of battle will come
But the victory is already ours
Through Christ in the power of one
The Power of Christ
Surrounded by the angels of God
Step to the realm where evil reigns
We are soldiers prepared for war
With the power to speak his name
Satan with his legion of demons
Deceiving with his wicked ways
With his life he has paid
With his word
I will slay
Any demon that steps in my way
So bring it on
Bring it on
It's the P.O.D. on the mic rockin' the set
In case you didn't know Payable On Death
Making suckers drop, kick'n non stop
The hard rock'n thrash, with a little hip hop
Four christians brother on a roll, there we go
Coming up hard, but you know we got soul
I'm strapped, yes we're packed, and it's about time
Jesus got my back P.O.D.'s on the frontline
Three in the power of one, three in the power of one
Three in the power of one, three in the power of one
Three in the power of one, three in the power of one
Three in the power of one, three in the power of one
You are 26 yrs old.. Your Inner Child Is Naughty You Should Learn Chinese Your Ideal Relationship is Serious Dating Your Dating Purity Score: 96%
13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.
20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.
30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!
40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.What Age Do You Act?Hahah... am i really that matured??How Is Your Inner Child?Woah ..this is so cool..What Language Should You Learn?YUCKS!! I SHOULD LEARN CHINESE?? YUCKS!!erm.. is this true? hahDating Purity Testhmm.. thts so true..
BLUE
You give your love and friendship unconditionaly. You enjoy long, thoughtful conversations rich in philosophy and spirituality. You are very loyal and intuitive.
Blogging bout yesterday.. coz yesterday nigth i too tired to blog liao.. =P
Hmm..iets see.. yesterday was fully packed for me.. in the morning i went to city hall mrt for my gen12 ii team meeting..we had only 4 members from Sp.. and one staff.. (who wanted to go overseas to help the chiristian ministry but in the end was posted with us..) But its kinda good coz i really dunno her well.. now got chance to know her better.. =)
So we met up at city hall mrt (9.30) and headed down to the nearest macdonalds.. we went upstairs to sit and i was attracted instantly by the free flow of coffee.. So i quickly rush down to buy a student meal.. (normally breakfast set if 5 dollars but students pay only 4 dollars) Then come up, we discuss bout what we wanna do for our mission trip in Singapore.. Coz at first, our mission trip's name was called pioneering campuses.. But, cannot go universities to pioneer campuses as we only had 5 members in our team.. But then, 1 girl, (a tp girl) had some problems and so dropped out of the team after discussing with her dgl.. (didn't get to see her at all.. whose she?)
Well, we decided to change our team name to M.I.B (Mission in Backyard).. It sounds kinda cool yeah? And well, we decided to have our team trainings every campuses crusade harvest day held on the wednesday afternoon each week.. Then team meetings would follow and we hope to stop all meetings 2 weeks before the poly end of yr exams.. But after the exams, we will intensify our trainings till its time for us to go on the mission..
What is our mission doing now?
Well, we have decided to reach out the Sp.. Mainly the chinese international students.. We also wish to reach out to another insitutions nursing fellowship.. It consists of mainly foreign students coming to Singapore to study nursing.. Well, we hope to organise certain events for them during the holidays to reach out to them..
Hmm.. we will be staying at the GCTC.. Thats our campus crusade headquarters at dunno where.. I seriously forgot the place liao.. =P But if i leak out the adress ltr it might kena bombed by terrorists.. then i siao liao lah!! Hmm.. But, i know its somewhat near Sp.. and also somewhat near Sentosa.. Wow.. right in the middle..
Sianz..forerunner will be located nxt door.. (Forerunner, is 1 of 3 christian bands set up by the Campus Crusade for Christ ministries to reach out to the lsot in Singapore and ard the world thru music..) I hate their band practices siah!! Always so noisy.. Somemore, i tink they are very action and proud of themselves.. Can play mucic then so what? There are other christian bands in Sg who i feel can play much better than u all but are not action as u guys ok!! Last time i got peek at their jamming sessions and wah lau ehx.. They all running ard playing like small kids.. Then i always hear that they are like jamming together almost every other day.. They no sch issit?? Dropouts?? Hahh.. shall not comment.. But hey, u can find their music cd's in many Christian shop catalogues in Singapore..
Hmm.. after the meeting we took some pictures.. Wooh.. lucky i was wearing my contacts that day.. hah.. was almost deciding not to wear them coz i was too lazy..
After that, i rushed back to bkt batok interchange to take a bus to my church.. Cosbt.. Wah lua.. went to bus interchange but bus 852 just left!! If only i run frm the mrt station to interchange siah!! Then sian lorx.. had to wait for anther bus.. Lucky the bus came fast..
Happy to say i went to church for cellgrp on time.. (30 mins earlier.. -.-")
Hmm.. we had lots of ice breaker games to start of the new yr.. My cell had 2 new members.. One guy who just graduated from my sec sch and me..
Ok we had several ice breaker games before we went to worship and devotion..
I shared to my cell grp how i kept rembering my grandpas death when in church coz it was somewhat related.. Last time, I wanted to ask he cantonese congretion in my church to reach out to my grandparents.. And er.. the cantonese congretions former room for its sunday services was quite close by.. Erm.. the memories of my grandpa when i visited him in his Hospital ward in SGH kept flooding by.. It really hurt.. I dun tink i will ever return to SGH.. and i just felt a sudden despair.. I kept rembering how one moment he was still in the SGH ward and able to talk and eat and drink and watch tv.. And the nxt moment, he was gone.. All becuase he's organs failed..
Then when we went on to sing the christian song titled Here i am.. Well, as we sang up till the "I will go where u send me Jesus take me now i am yours" I was so filled with anguish that i wantesd to burst into tears.. It seems that even though i have been trying to put up a brave front to everone i knew, i still had not come into terms with my grandpas death.. And they say the truth hurts.. alot.. It was almost as if it sturck me again that i had failed to complete god's command to reach to the lost..
i would have burst into tears, if not for the contact lenses i was wearing..
After the song, we went on to group sharings.. the sisters went to one corner, while the borthers another corner..I was quiote open on how i felt bout this church, and we were all chatting bout what needed to be improved in this church, and how the atmosphere for worship in the church aservices were not good conditions to actualy worship god.. Well, we talked bout many ppl who try to act holy in church but their lifes outside are a mess, and how there are many ppl who are not true brothers and sisters in church.. even went to talk bout my former cell grp.. philadelphia.. Hmm.. then we also discussed bout what was the diff btwn giving our opinions and judging others..
Ok.. normally i dun go into such detail bout my life.. But today i juz want to share this coz the events that happened very much ltr are linked..
Went for yesterdays church service..(snl) we were all worshipping god together and i just didn't want to jump coz i felt it was pointless.. (Other churches youth dun jump or dance.. so why shld we be the special ones? Also , i dun tink i have seen the pastors jumping?)
Well, this made me recall the xmas event in my church a few weeks back.. I remebered how this one guy came up to mwe as we were worshipping god and asked why i didn't want to jump.. I gave him a simple reply.. Worshipping god is not always bout jumping..
Ok, i just want to explain.. I mean, ppl might say tht we jump coz we are overjoyed that we are born again.. (pastor daniel shared why we jump or why we raise our hands to praise god) Hmm.. i already knew why we did so, but it seemed that 2 yrs ago, i didn't.. and i was too scared to find out why coz i felt ppl might laugh at me.. ok that was liek the past..
then pastor daniel said that if some ppl are non-movers in church, leave them alone and concentrate on other non-christians to see to their salvation.. (Hey, sorry if i got whatever u said wrong pastor daniel) At tht point.. i was like HUH? OH MY GOSH? If u dun care bout the non-movers, then what if they backslide from church?? Hey i am very concerned bout ppl who backslide from cosbt ok!! I was once one!!
Then i feel that when i was jumping in church 2 yrs back, it was bcoz others were doing it and so i wanted very much to follow the crowd.. And, i feel many youths in church are still doing tht.. Even though they are told repeatedly the reason why they should do that..
U can clearly see wad.. its like certain parts of the song where many ppl stop jumping, they will jump for a while before realising that they are no longer part of the crowd anymore and then slowly stop jumping!! WAH LIAO EHX!! I AM CORRECT RIGHT?? This kind of thing is like SO OBVIOUS LORX!! If u really want to jump for joy, u would do so even though nobody does it with you.. Coz, it is your PERSONAL relationship with god.. and u should NEVER care about what others think as u worship god!!
Got a few surprises yesterday when it was annouced that 2 church workers were becoming pastors and that the church youth services in our church were expanding to 2 more sessions a week.. So thts like 3 services a week?? Hmm.. well, one of the new pastors was my bb officer.. Well, he was talkig bout how when we sleep we release dreams.. and this kinda make me think back to my 2002 mission trip where i was his bunk mate and he just freaked me out that night when he kept rising up and down from his bed with his arms stretched out.. I still remembered rushing to the door of the hotel room and taking out my bible to pray.. Hahahaha..
But ltr the nxt morning of the mission trip he told me tht he was jsut playing a prank on me.. And then everyone who heard it laughed.. -.-" Well tht was like when i was in sec 2?
Ok during half of my bb officers sermon, i had to leave for my friends Sp chinese Orchestra performance.. Hmm.. went all the way to the bus stop to wait for a bus.. But shit!! The bus take so long to come!! In the end, i took a taxi to Sp.. Wasted $5.70 on taxi fare!!And the ticket to the Chinese Orchestra performance i paid like $5.00 before?? So altogether its like $10.70??
Hmm.. the Chinese Orchestra had tied in with the Chiense language Society to produce their concert.. Well, the mc for that day was from the cls and the Singers for that day (except one who was co)were also from the cls..The performances were quite good and i kinda liked one of the singers voices that night.. really good.. But i was wondering why she nvr participate in all those Sp singing competitions.. Hmmz..
Ok.. thats bout all.. God bless all the readers today..
Hmm.. today had a hard time persuading my mum to sign my gen12 ii application form.. Well, she ask me so many questions bout gen 12 ii and she had so many phone calls and was so busy tht it really tested my paitence a lot.. Ok, the gen12 ii is an annual mission trip organised by the campus crusade for christ Singapore.. It combines crusaders from all the diff polys together to go for mission trips to many diff countries like Thailand, East Asia, Cambodia, Australia, malaysia, South Africa, and even one with a band selection where promising crusaders get to form a band and tour around the world to spread god's love!!
Hmm.. I really thank my dgl for talking to my mum abt the gen12 ii during my grandpa's wake.. Really.. I would nvr have had the courage to ask my mum permission to go for it.. Thankfully, my disciple grp leader managed to do so.. Its also a plus point tht my mum taught my dgl for one of his modules last sem.. And so, my mum knows my dgl to be a very nice and hardworking person.. thank goodness for tht.. =)
Hmm.. its finally after my MST!! Its time to celebrate for a few days before i get back to intensive revision for my final yr exams!! Bought new contacts.. Decided to wear them once again coz i am really starting to get sick of wearing specs liao.. -.-"
Might consider dying my hair once again.. But, that really depends.. Coz, i just dun feel like dying my hair to some weird colour again.. Also, i am a bit lazy.. =P Then i also know tht christians shld not juz anyhow dye their hair or wax their hair to create appearances.. Coz god created us for who we are and so we should not anyhow alter what is came naturally to us.. So tht means no tattoos or any piercings.. haixx.. sadz.. But long hair.. still acceptable bahz? =P
Ok.. i have decided to stop buying new techno albums.. i find it pointless.. i mean its like everytime a new album comes out i go bankrupt coz i always have this impulse to buy it.. Diao.. techno u collect also cannot collect finish one lah.. Coz dere will always be new albums comingout.. I tink i might as well juz go support the cheaper alternative.. Piracy.. Yeah.. P2P downloading.. Risky but the rewards are dere.. =P
Decided to fix my mp3 soon.. Fed Up with my half spoilt mp3 that cannot play techno properly.. Also need to get a new set of ear phones for my mp3 coz my creative ear phones are busted.. Shit.. its after the festive season and i am still spending.. Already making huge losses buying my contacts coz i didn't buy it ard the Christmas period.. Spectacle Hut in West Mall (WAS) having a 70 percent discount on all its products lehx!!! WAH LIAO!! 70%!!! SHIT LAH!!
What else.. zzzzzz... brand new sch bag? i'm still deciding.. coz i'm short of cash fast..Juz thursday i had 260 dollars.. now its reduced to juz 100 plus dollars.. Crap.. new clothes i will be getting.. Mum's paying for it though.. (Coz its also used for chinese new year mahz..) ^^
New handphone ah? (hey, i'm practically gg thru my entire wish list) =) Dun wan bah? i no $$ and my dad promised to get me a new plan with new hp if i score well for this sem.. Hmm.. food for thought.. my handphone also can do basic functions liao..If i want bluetooth i can wait long long lah!! Btw, i'm now using a starhub prepaid plan and it has its good and bad points lah.. Dun wish to comment anymore..
Hehe.. my hair dye is still lying at home.. all i need to do is juz apply it and hehe.. hair golden yellow liao.. But still considering heavily.. I kinda regretted buying the hair dye coz i like my black hair now.. sobz.. =(
I also realised sth urgent.. i jsut cannot keep placing all my earlier posts in my blog!! It kinda lags otu my blog and i really need my archive link section back asap!! But siao liao!! I tired out the coding before but it just wouldn't work.. Shit.. I want my archive links back!! If one day my postings get too many then die lorx.. Either i only show my most recent postings in my blog only or my blog becoem sibei laggy till cannot acess.. -.-"
Then horx, when i was viewing my blog one day, i found out sth startling with my blog.. The change was so obvious yet i did not notice it!! I tried to view my blog in all the diff. web browsers but still the same effect!! Oh My Gosh!! And, the change is not i wanted!! Ok lah.. i better tell u all what tht change is.. Did u all notice tht...
... my blog skin has now become smaller?? Goshes!! Just a month ago i could only view a part of the entire skin.. Now its like the skin has shrank to a smaller size!! But i didn't change any of the coding!!! Ok, maybe i edited a bit of the scroll bars colours and maybe i chaged a bit of the words dere.. <------- Also changed the snow flakes falling to rain.. But tht was it!! Oh my goodness.. Now i dun really like my skin liao!! Arrrggghhh!! Hping to find a new skin soon!! Blogskins.com here i come!!
Hmm.. yupz.. thts bout all.. Hope you guys will stay blessed by the lord always!!
Today was the worst MST day in my poly life.. Waahh!! All the papers today were like so hards.. Today networking test all the most unexpected questions came out.. I study wrong thing also lah!! All those i concentrate on in the netf text book, nvr come out!! Somemore i so stupid to memorise the definition of what "packet" what "frame" what "field".. I also go and study the definition of the diff layer of the OSI model and also their use.. In the end, i cram too much in my head, go exam room all forgot liao.. Siao liao lah!! Also the test got one question is base on one of our netf assignments.. But SHIT!! I totally forgot everthing that i did for the assignment!! When i was studying i even though tht since assignment come out tht topic liao then tht topic exam sure won't come out.. I was so wrong.. (Regrets..)
Then come webp.. I starting already got problem liao.. Create my first pg like so slow.. Also, when i ask the cher in charge questions, she come and give me that fuck face.. Anyhow give all those ppl who ask her questions attitude.. go and say what "You should know" or "Just do what u think is correct".. PLEASE LORX!! IF i knew how to do i wouldn't have asked u right??
Then i think i the most kelian of all the ppl doing the web publishing test.. I think i ask the most questions all the way until the cher too fedup and come ask me if i always pon teen the webp praticals one.. Wah liao ehx!! How can u anyhow accuse ppl!! I got come for all my webp practicals ok!! Somemore i ask my webp cher lots of questions during practicals.. I also got take dreamweaver crash course before poly ok!!
But sibei siao.. the entire webp test i like left almost everything blank.. Then when i look ard at all my other classmates they like progressing so fast.. So i got very scared.. Almost wanted to cry when i couldn't even make out a page.. Felt like leaving the comp lab and just break down in tears outside.. I can tell u, in the 1hr and 30 mins, i was SO stressed!!
I kept thinking how to answer to my webp cher when the test results were to be released later.. I was like gg to tell her that i was very very stressed during the exam and so i just messed it up.. Even wanted to ask her (more like beg her) after the webp test for a second chance..
Even said to myself.. "Die liao Nxt time must chiong my webp assignment and get very very high marks for it to ensure i pass webp.."
Then the worst thing happened.. Siao Liao!! My dreamweaver got error and just shut itself down!! I panicked like mad siah!! Quickly asked cher what to do and i felt like i was gg to die in the exam hall.. I kept thinknig tht all was lost..
Ok after i restarted my dreamweaver, i managed to do a bit here and dere.. But i was still very disillusioned with how i could even get 10 marks.. To me, it was like i could only get a fat fail grade.. I quickly tell the cher in charge tht the test paper was really messy and i just could not see anything out of it.. (The mock test that we had was like so clear lorx!!) she go and counter.. say that its very easy to read.. Wah liao!! Of coz easy for you to read lah!! Its you who set the paper wad!!
After the chers in charge say to stop our webp test, i can confirm tht no one cmpleted the webp test.. Even the fastest student in other classes and in our class managed to do up till pg 9 or 10 of like 16 pages..
After the exam, i hear frm everyone tht the paper was indeed diff.. So i was like.. phew.. I thought i was the only one gg to fry.. And, in othe rclasses, even good hardworking students were complaining and some also did ard the same amt as me.. Thank the lucky stars.. I am not gg to be alone.. I juz hope that moderation of the paper will be quite lenient.. I can confirm that the chers who mark all of our papers will vomit blood..
Masterboy - Generation Of Love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Give me all your loving, give me all your loving
Give me all you loving, make it true
Give me you loving, give me all you loving
Give me all you loving, me to you
Boys and girl up and down
Move your body round and round
Pump the bass up in this place
Put a smile back in your face
Take control, don't waste time
The heat is on, you're feeling fine
Feel the power from above
Call it generation of love
Baby give me all your passion
Baby give me all your love
Baby give me all your passion
Baby give me all your love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Give me all your loving, give me all your loving
Give me all you loving, make it true
Give me you loving, give me all you loving
Give me all you loving, me to you
Here I go, here I go Kiss me baby, let it flow
You know how to make it right
Light my fire, hold me tight
People of the night keep grooving
Got to get it right, you’re moving
Feel the power from above
Call it generation of love
Everybody is feeling happy
Everybody, everywhere
Everybody is feeling happy
Everybody, everywhere
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love
Give me all your loving, give me all your loving
Give me all you loving, make it true
Give me you loving, give me all you loving
Give me all you loving, me to you
Boys and girls - the new generation
Call it generation of love