[[ Freedom Fighters.. Lost Cause.. ]]

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

The Bible..

The greatest book in History!!

Contains God's (our creator's) living word.

Teaches you life stories.

Sets an example for your life.

Salvation can be found inside!!

Shows you the way to lead your life with direction...

... and many more!!

Fact file:

Did you know that the bible predicted ...

... the breaking up of the Soviet Union?

... the Country of Israel being created?

... natural disasters happening more
and more in the future and with greater
intensity than ever before?

... information travel by humans today
will be at very fast rates?

all these...

... plus many more!!

The Book of truth.. The Bible.. Get yours today!!

Support the bible.. and discover the truth about your existence today!!

Know more abt life after death and what we are truly living our lives for!!


ATTENTION!

The International bestseller is now facing competition by the Da-Vinci Code!!

----> Please take note that the Da-Vinci Code contains many theories that contest the Bible... Please take note that even the author (Dan Brown) did not give his opinion when interviewed (Sometime back, National Geographic had a special documentary on the Da-Vinci Code and they interviewed Dan Brown) as to whether those things he wrote abt Christianity in his book were true.. H elaso stated that his book was fictional.. And, that is the truth..

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|11:06 PM|

Innovative Ways of Ordering Pizza

Sian of just dialing, waiting and paying? Here are some innovative (OK, OK, wu liao) ways of ordering pizza…

1. Ask them if you can keep the box. When they say yes, break into tears and go, “Thank you! Thank you so much! God bless you!” etc.

2. Ask them to make sure your pizza is really dead – not like the last time like that.

3. Ask them to confirm exactly how many dolphins had to be killed in order to make your pizza.

4. When they repeat your order back to you, change it slightly. Do this three or four times.

5. Ask them if they have one inch pizzas.

6. Ask them acherly, hor, how come they measure their pizzas in inches and not centimetres, ha?

7. When they ask, “Will that be all?”, reply angrily: “Why, not satisfied, ah? I order so little so you see me no up, is it? Neh’mine! Steady! Later I call my brother all come to your shop and settle!”

8. Ask what the order taker is wearing, and when he or she answers, go, “Mmmm.”

9. Ask them to arrange the pepperoni in the shape of Hello Kitty.

10. In sign language. Over the phone.

11. Tell the order taker to speak very softly, because the “Men in White” are tapping your line.

12. Ask them to hold on, then shout in a child’s voice, “Mummy, can borrow me fifty loller buy pizza?”

13. Pretend the pizza hotline is the NKF donation line, and ask the pizza guy to do ridiculous and unhealthy stunts before you hand over your money.



Fun Things to Do in Lifts

Lifts just haven’t been as fun since the Gahmen installed those pesky urine detectors. If you’re looking for alternatives to generating Newater in elevators or just feeling wu liao in general, here’s a list of FUN THINGS TO DO IN LIFTS.

1. Move a desk inside the lift. Wear a suit and sit at the desk. When the doors open, smile and say, “Good morning. Do you have an appointment?”

2. Say “Ding!” at every floor.

3. Use your phone camera to snap everyone who comes in, saying, “Dun mind, ah, for my blog.”

4. Whenever someone presses a button, make a sound like an explosion. (Suggested: “Chibaboom!”)

5. Make farting noises. Then glare at someone and go, “Tsk!”

6. Dress up like a devil. When people get in, smile and ask, “Going down?”

7. When someone steps in, ask, “Which floor?”, then press the wrong one.

8. Whenever the doors open, wave your hand like a Jedi Knight.

9. Meow occasionally.

10. Pick your nose conspicuously.

11. Approach everyone inside and ask whether they’ve got life insurance.

12. Bring an empty bag into the lift. Open it a little, and whisper into it, “Got enough air in there, not? You sure, ah?”

13. Wear all white, and shake everyone’s hands, saying, “More good years!”



Lines from Star Wars That Can Be Improved by Replacing a Word with ‘Pants’


In honour of the upcoming release of Episode III, our Wits team has decided to improve on some classic Star Wars dialogue by making key replacements.


1. I find your lack of pants disturbing.
2. You are unwise to lower your pants.
3. Chewie and me got into a lot of pants more heavily guarded than this.
4. The Force is strong in my pants.
5. I cannot teach him. The boy has no pants.
6. Governer Tarkin. I should have expected to find you holding Vader's pants.
7. I think you just can't bear to let a gorgeous guy like me out of your pants.
8. Your pants, you will not need them.
9. These aren't the pants you're looking for.
10. You came in those pants? You're braver than I thought.
11. Pull up! All pants pull up!
12. I sense the conflict within you. Let go of your pants!
13. Alderaan is peaceful, we have no pants!
14. The pants will be down in moments, sir, you can begin your landing.
15. In his pants you will find a new definition of pain and suffering
16. That blast came from the pants! That thing's operational!
17. Great, Chewie, great. Always thinking with your pants.
18. I've just made a deal that will keep the Empire out of our pants forever.
19. A disturbance in the pants. I have not felt this since near my old master...
20. Lock the door. And hope they don't have pants.
21. Looks like someone's beginning to take an interest in your pants.
22. Jabba, please take these pants as a token of friendship
23. Your pants can deceive you. Don't trust them
24. Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your pants.
25. It's your father's pants. This is the weapon of a Jedi Knight.
26. Look at the size of those pants!
27. You knew my pants?
28. Search your pants, you know it to be true.
29. Yahoo! You're all clear kid. Now let's blow these pants and go home!
30. I've got a bad feeling in my pants about this.

- from various sources online and off

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|8:39 PM|

I got this from the talkingcock.com website.. its so funny siah.. enjoy.. =)



The CHAP SAR TIAM SECRET SOCIETY, a Geylang-based organization for youth, is now recruiting members to fulfill a tender they are submitting to the new casi… sorry, sorry, integrated resort.

Please fill in the form below and mail to:

Mr. Chao Ah Beng
Membership Occifer
Chap Sar Tiam Secret Society
69 Geylang Lorong 69
Singapore 696969


Reference code: TalkingCock.com

APPLICATION FOR MEMBERSHIP IN CHAP SAR TIAM SECRET SOCIETY

1. NRIC No.: _________________

2. Surname: __________________

3. First name: (please X)
[ ] Johnson
[ ] Benson
[ ] Samson
[ ] Hamson
[ ] Janson
[ ] Other: _________________ (if not ending in ‘son’, please explain why)

4. Chinese Name: Ah __________(if not beginning with ‘Ah’, please explain why)

5. Age: [ ] Under 35 [ ] Lau Beng

6. Sex: [ ] M [ ] F [ ] at Geylang

7. Length of Last Fingernail: ________ (cm)

8. Ability to squat for:
[ ] 1 hour
[ ] 2 hours
[ ] more than 2 hours (wah, steady!)

9. Hairstyle:
[ ] Spiky
[ ] Dyed with streaks of blond
[ ] Dyed with streaks of red
[ ] Two strands dangling in front of eyes
[ ] Kana mop like that
[ ] Perm (please state which saloon in JB you went)____________________

10. Tattoo of:
[ ] Tiger
[ ] Dragon
[ ] Snake
[ ] Eagle
[ ] Hello Kitty

11. Work experience: (please X all that apply)
[ ] KTV Launge Bouncer
[ ] Snooker Hall Attendant
[ ] Unlicensed Contractor
[ ] Freelance debt collector
[ ] Unlicensed bookie
[ ] Dispute Resolution and Settlement Professional
[ ] Unemployed

12. Spouse's Name: _________________________
2nd Spouse's Name: _________________________
3rd Spouse's Name: (the one in Batam, that one) _________________________
Lover's Name: _________________________
2nd Lover's Name: (Lorong 69, that pooi-pooi one) _________________________

13. Number of children living in household: ____
Number of children living in foster care: ____
Number of children that are actually yours: ____

14. Mother's Name: _________________________ (If not sure, leave blank)
15. Father's Name: _________________________ (If not sure, leave blank)

16. Education: (Circle how many years it took you to finish primary school)
8 9 10 11 12

17. Ability to swear: (please X all that apply)
[ ] Hokkien
[ ] English
[ ] Malay
[ ] Tamil
[ ] Cantonese
[ ] rude hand gestures

18. Service performed in previous secret society:
[ ] Leadership/Tua Tao
[ ] Junior management/Suay Tao
[ ] Physical activities/Hooting
[ ] Dispute Resolution and settlement/Cham Siong
[ ] Lookout/Kuah Chui

With your application, please also enclose sample of blood (need not be your own).

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|8:36 PM|

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Well, this week has been pretty good. Every thing has stabilised in my life.. Currently having my personal retreat.. Fasting alot also.. Well, i will be going to the crusade room less and less .. Hope all the crusaders will understand.. Recently, i have been playing Quake 3 more in the sch Comp labs.. Dota also.. (Think i am addicted liao..) haha..

Haha.. on saturday i went of of house and then i discovered got this group of old men sitting together at the void deck of blk 114 grooving to some kiddy song.. Its that chinese kid song "Tian Tang lah" I learnt that in primary 1.. lol.. But yah, they were tapping their walking sticks to the beat and i tink i saw them nodding their heads.. (This makes me feel blessed for Techno..) ^^

Well, on friday and today near my house dere got some Open air movie marathon.. Well, it was broadcast life in Gold 90 fm and yeah, the screen is like those movie cinema screens.. But, the sound effect is like -----> WOAH!! *Imagines open-air clubbing* LOL!!


So many ppl frm Batok turned up for the event siah.. All sitting down on the first day (Friday) at the field and having things like food and sleeping bags..

Ok, last friday at 8.00 they were showing "The myth".. (Yah its the one by jackie chan..) Then at 10 o clock .. i went home.. But my younger bro stayed on to watch the Polar Express.. Then, today at 8.00 they showing Charlie and the chorcolate factory.. And, wait till u hear this.. *excited* At 10.00, they are showing INITIAL-D!!! WOO HOO!!

I asked my bukit batok frens if they knew abt this event, but they shocked me by saying that the event was held in their part of batok but only this year, it moved to below my blk..

Well, u can check out the Gold 90 fm website for more details.. Brian richmond and another female dj are there daily to host the event!! Woo Hoo!!


Yesterday, (Which was a Saturday) I went downstairs to watch Initial-D.. Well, the turnout wasn't as good as fridays as it had rained in the afternoon and well, the field was wet.. So i guess that most ppl assumed that the field would be too wet to sit.. But i was very persistent.. I still went.. Hey, there's still a lot of chairs in the field wadz.. Found a chair and sat down to watch Initial-D.. Well, to tell you honestly, i did not watch Initial-D in the cinemas becoz at that time, i was flat broke.. So now, can watch it for free.. Who don't want siah?? =P

I expected the turnout to be filled with mostly teenagers.. But Wah Lau eh!! Who knew that mostly old folks, little children and middle aged Batokians got turn up for such an event..

But hey, who cares.. Intial-D was such a nice movie.. hmm.. but then very funny lehx.. Got some parts when Jay Chou was racing techno beat will fill in the bkgrnd.. Dunno why.. I just keep shaking my head to the beat.. Hiaxx.. A techno freak will always be a techno freak.. =)


Got this from the talkingcock.com Website.. (Enjoy..) =)

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|1:47 PM|

Monday, November 21, 2005

I just had my IQ test..

I just had my IQ test done at web.tickle.com

What's Your IQ?

Congratulations, Isaac Ying!Your IQ score is 115
This number is based on a scientific formula that compares how many questions you answered correctly on the Classic IQ Test relative to others. Your Intellectual Type is Precision Processor. This means you're exceptionally good at discovering quick solutions to problems, especially ones that involve math or logic. You're also resourceful and able to think on your feet. And that's just some of what we know about you from your test results.

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|12:13 AM|

Saturday, November 19, 2005

Ok, i made some changes to my blog.. Hey, to all Crusaders attempting to read my blog like its half price sale at Robinsons or John Little, the postings that i've asked u all to read can be found way down the Blog.. Sorry for the inconvenience, but i really need to post more stuff or my blog will kena outdated.. But, hey, i'm doing fine since those last postings.. I have found the answers to my tribulations and i will work towards improving it.. =)

And yeah, i made some improvements to my bog.. Dun mind the techno music being played whether or not u like techno.. Can always turn off the volume mahx.. =) And yeah, i added snow for a special day happening in December..Was lazy at first to put in snow and all that extra stuff.. Coz , i was rather busy these days.. But, one of my classmates actually asked me why i dun want to put the images into my blog.. (The bigger snowflakes falling it the side of my blog) And, she showed me that i can use photobucket to host the images.. Last time i tried using angelfire and geocities to host.. but always cannot one.. =( But hey, after so long of having no images at the side floating by, now there's snow!! And, just in time for Christmas!! Special thanks to Lee Min for everything.. Really appreciate what u have taught me..

And yeah, i changed my blog text to white.. on the advice of a "friend".. Well, she said that my colour combination skills were very bad and she said well, black goes with white.. So okaez.. White it is then.. Already my blog so snowy then must put the text as white.. All geared up for Christmas siah.. ^^

Then horx, many of those ppl viewing my blog keep asking me why i dun put in a tag box.. Ok.. so i dun have a tag box.. Its not bcoz i am lazy to have one or anything.. But i juz dun have the time to tag in my blog often.. So yeah.. i do have an alternative.. But somehow, nobody is using that alternative.. =( In case u all didn't know, i am telling u guys now.. To the left of my blog there's this icon labelled Guest Maps..

<------ Its down dere... See already? ^^

Well, u can post down dere but i won't be answering anything u guys post.. So yeah, pls do take the time to post..

Also i have realised that my archive links are missing.. I don't know the codes to get them back so if anyone, please help me!! =(


Lately horx, my bro is pissing me off with maple story.. Say what everday got promotion till 12 o clock so must play more.. And what scroll what surfboard worth Singapore 20 dollars when sold to other players.. Another one of his get rich quick schemes bah? He always likes to scam noobs by offering 20000 (20k) mesos (the maple currency) to noobs for each snowboard.. (theres 4 different kinds of snowboards.. sky, gold, zombie, aqua..) But, eaach snowboard is worth ard 500 k.. My goodness.. 500k - 20 k = 480 k.. Wah liao.. Must learn from him.. ^^

Then my brother always use the computer at night when my parents are ZzZzZzZ.. So evil siah.. But lately, my dad is always catching him late in the night playing the computer.. Orbi siah.. Serves him right.. Then my brother is becoming sooo pro in dota, he defeated his clan leader!! OMG!! Now, he is changing clans.. But i tink he shld become a WarCraft Clan leader himself.. (1 human and 1 comp easy ) versus (5 computer insane) he also can win siah.. Talk abt mad for dota..

Well, yesterday i had my Gems..Essentials of Marketing.. (A very nice gem module that teaches us how to market products to customers..) There's this other Crusader freshy inside my gems class and yeah, we try to keep up with the lesson together..Well, the teacher says that i have a very good basic undertanding of management and that puts me way ahead of the other classmates.. Wow!! I didn't know i was that good siah.. Aslo, she found that my friend and i were very dilligent students because we always do our tutorials before every lesson.. And, she also said that i was a very sharp student in her class and she said that because i told her i knew her teaching style in such a short time.. ^^ Didn't know i was so "Sharp"...=P Well, my friend and i are going to be the top students in her class.. lol.. Our Gpa sure high high one..Hey, right now i know alot of you must be thinking.. "Is this the bing hao we all know? Hey, don't laugh!! But the Cher got say such things about me horx!! Later when i ace this module i will show u all my grade...Then i can prove to you that i am finally an a1 student.. ^^ ooohh... Must work extra hard and ask more questions in class...lol..

<---- And remember, my Guest Map is down dere..

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|11:25 AM|

Friday, November 18, 2005

Our Identity As Crusaders..

Our Identity As Crusaders...
I've always been wondering since before meta.. What really makes acrusader.. As you all know, every crusader has to have a dg grp.. But, itmade me wonder.. is joining a dg grp and just attending a dg grp in crusadeenough? Or should we go the extra mile and go for more crusade activities?Well, i've already shared this with a few crusaders and staff and yeah, ishld share it with all you brothers and sisters.. Maybe we should allreflecton why we first joined the crusade and what wel feel makes us crusaders..


Lately, a few crusader's shared with me abt how serving in their church wasmore impt than crusade and yeah i agree with them on that.. Well, they toldme that they wanted to quit crusade to serve church. Once again, it wastheir choice.. I could not force them to do anything.. But, i was repeatedlyencouraged to ask christians to join the crusade.. so that, as one bigstrong body of christ in Sp, we would be more effective in reaching out tothe 14k in poly..


Yeah, i agree that we need more labourers to be sent out to the harvestfields.. I support the crusade a lot and have been doing so for so longbecause i want to have oppotunities to grow more spiritually.. Well, while iwas backslidding, i joined the crusade so that it culd pull me back to theBody of Christ.. Back then, i was not attending church and if u took thetime to read my blog, you can see how terrible my backslidden state i wasin.. I felt totally lost and empty.. Even felt like sucidding before in mylife.. All because back then, i did not understand the true meaning of beinga Christian..

But, early last semester when a crusade senior asked me one day.. "BingHao.. are u a christian?"

Well, i gave a muffled yes..

And he went on.."How are you so sure?"

And i can tell u this..at that very moment, and with that very question, iwas completely stunned.. because, i wasn't really sure of the answer..
But, that crusade senior assured me that i was a Christian.. Just that i wasreally lost and i needed direction once again.. Well it kinda hurt at thattime to know that i wasn't sure of my identity in Christ..

But gradually, i felt like.. Hey i need answers.. and i need direction formy life and that plan for my life that god has assured..I have gone a long way since that question was tested on me.. And beforelast sem ended, i found the answer to that question.. =)

Ok, so i found out what makes us Christians, but i was still finding out..What makes us Crusaders? Is it the number of crusade activites that we gothat confirms we are crusaders? Is it the number of times we visit thecrusade room to make ourselves known to fellow crusaders that makes us acrusader??

Well, i'm not sure abt my fellow brothers and sisters views, but me ans tothose questions would be a definite "NO!!" I feel that i joined crusade togrow more spiritually and increase my shield of faith.. (What Changyaoshared to the crusaders during my very first CLM..) And i joined crusade sothat i can be encouraged to be a blessing to others..

Yeah, before i joined crusade and went for the meta camp, i was very scardto reach ot the lost.. Yeah, many Chrisatians out there are still living a lie and being deceived that they can be content with what they have and juststay in their "Jerusalem" or maybe just serve in their Church and grow more,but forget abt otheir friends and families and relatives and just basicallyeverybody they know..
In fact, i feel that its a blessing if u are popular and have "contacts",because u can reach out to more ppl and can set examples of what Christians are like..

Becuase, unlike Christians, many non-Christians tend to be completely judgemental.. If their only Christian friend is you and they want to findout what a Christian is like, where would they turn to find the ans? A localchurch near them? No.. they would turn to you.. Yeah, so our actions willultimately determine what our non-Chriatian friends will think aboutChristians.. And if they have bad impressions of us as Christians, then itwould be hard for us or maybe even other harvesters in Singapore to shareChrist to them..

I had always thought that if i spent more time in Crusade, i would be moredistant from my class.. But, i realised that i was wrong.. I realised that basically it was my behaviour and attitude in class that contributed to that"distance".. And yeah, where i ha failed to make friends in my class, otherChristians in my class found it quite easy to socialise with them.. So yeah, they did not discriminate because of my religion but because of myself..

I did not blame them for thinkig that way because they were non-christianandyeah, they could have been judgemental.. The crusade has never judged me andi really felt loved by everyone in crusade..

However i would like to address and issue that i feel is happening in theCrusade..Whenever a newcomer goes to crusade, i feel that many crusader'smaynot feel compiled to approach him/her and talk to him/her.. And, i thatnewcomer,be it Christian or Non-Christian might not feel welcomed by the crusade..Yeah,although there are still are Crusaders who will approach these people, butifevery Crusader makes the effort to make these people feel welcome, i cantell u,they will already be making decisions that very moment to join he crusade..

A newcomer to Crusade not being welcomed is like a non-Christian beinginvited toChurch and basically not wishing to visit that Church again.. So, i wouldlike to share with the Crusaders what one of my Church Pastors shared lately one Sunday Service.. Well, apparently, his duaghter had been sucessful in inviting a muslim guy to Church one day.. But, when they were sitting in for service, theChurch members was very judgemental over that muslim by whispering to the pastor's daughterwith questions like "What is he doing here?" or questions like "Why did you bring him here?" and no one wanted to approach that Muslim to make him feel welcome..So the next Sunday service, that Muslim guy just stopped coming.. He even stopped contact with the pastor's daughter.. Well, what am i trying to say here? I am not tryingto judge anyone but i feel that i have failed in many areas in making peoplefeelwelcome in crusade..
Well, i am trying very very hard to build up relations with all of thebrothersand sisters in the Crusade.. I'm not sure if you all have noticed, but i am tryingto talk more to all of you.. But, i have failed in someways.. Well, last sem, there were 2 people who approached me with the intention to join the crusade.. Well, i brought them to the Crusade but within a shortspan oftime, they told me that they did not wish to continue in the Crusade.. That saddened me a lot because i was wondering if i could have done much more in making them feel welcome in Crusade.. Maybe they would have still been in the Crusade..

Back to my topic.. Even though the church or maybe even crusade is a christian organisation and not a corporate organisation, there will still be peoplewho will want to do things because they wish to do thingd just to seen by others as holyand notbecause thye want to serve God..

So yeah, i really hope that our reason fordoing thingsisnot to be seen in man's eyes but in god's eyes.. I hope that even if theydo notget leadership roles in Crusade, they would not complain or grumble becausei feel that the devil is trying to break the unity of the crusaders..Instead, justbe happy in everything that God has given you and continue to serve him inother ways.Again i will share what this crusader from another poly told me.. Well, shewas frommy church and yeah when i shared with her in msn about wanting to spead thegospelto my classmates, she asked me if i was an SM.. So, i told her that yeah, u don't need to be an SM to spead the gospel..Well, she realises that she was wrong and yeah she continues to support the crusade..

Well, i have gained a lot ofcrusade msn contacts,.. Some had already graduated from Crusade but some others had lefttheCrusadew when they graduated because they wanted to serve their church more..I have no objection to that.. But, what i realised is that some churches just do not support the Crusade and were close to banning their church members from joining it.. From what i learnt through chatting with some Crusader's that had left the Crusade early, i realised that their youth ministries had challenged them toleavethe Crusade and so they did.. Even my pastor did not support the Crusade but i am not judging anyway.. Well, he told me that he used to support the Crusad eand encourage the Church members to join the Crusade.. But subsequently, they started to neglect their Church and serve the Crusade 100%.. And from what i have heard,there were some Crusaders in Sp who have graduated who are fom my church..One of them has quit my Church and gone to City Harvest.. I think there was anotherwho kept bombing my Pastor with so many questions about christianity afte rgoing to Crusade and yeah he backlidded in the end?? But, basically i feelthat your faith must be strong first.. So i will always encourage people toberooted in their Church first before joining the Crusade.. But for me, irenewedmy relation with God in the Crusade and so i will always continue to supportthe Crusade..

I may not be the best person to tell people what they should do and i maynot even befit to tell the Crusader's any of these, but i hope that as a Strong Body inChrist,we will anknowledge that each of us is not perfect and we should keep encouraging each other to grow more and to seek god more.. Its just like what the WYS booklet says about many logs burning brightly but what would happen if one log was removed..Basically,no man is an island.. We need each other..


As a crusader, i did not have a defined clique in the crusade because ilooked upon every brother and sister as equals.. Well, i feel that eachand everyone of us should be treated as equals..none of us shouldbe left out.. =)


What i feel about Commitment..


Well, i feel that during cca week, we should try to find out the freshys reasons for joining crusade.. Hmm..some of you may find it rather unecessarybut i feel that we should at least know if they are just joining crusade forthe right reasons..Do they join it just for fun because they can make morefriends or because they have long-term goals of Christian growth and yeah,fufilling the great commision in Sp.. Well, i amnot saying that we should reject those freshys signing up.. But, at least we know which freshys have the wrong thinkings uopn joining and maybe we can work towards changing their mindsets.. In James 5:20 (NIV) it says.."20 remember this:Whoever turns a sinner from the error of his way will save him from death and cover over a multitude of sins."

When i first joined Crusade, my earlier expectation oftheCrusade was Well,to "Brainwash" me back into believing Christ once more..Well, it was a selfish and stupid reason, but the Crusade had really showed me why my thinking was wrong.. And so, if it had worked for me it will surely work for others as well...


So yeah, abt my last posting.. I still have plently to add upon.. Like this inspirational card filled with verses that my last sem poly classmate gave me after i shared with him abt my tribulations..

Well, basically, this is what it said.. "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding in all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Proverbs 3:5-6 (KJV)


And, if you have problems understanding god's plan for your life and just need some direction, the bible has the answers.. And the verses at the back of the card says..
"I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go. I will guide thee with mine eye"Psalm 32:8 (KJV)

Well, if you need direction,God has said that he will tell you where to go and also what to do.. So, in all things, do not fear..


" Happy is he that hath the God of Jacob for his help, whose hope is in the Lord his God"Psalm 146:5 (KJV)

Stay Happy always as a child of Chirst!! And do not grumble or Complain while being instructed by God to do his mighty works in the forsaken lands..


" It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man. It is better to trust in the Lord than to pit confidence in princes"Psalm 118:8-9 (KJV)

Like i shared before, one major problem in my life was being a ppl driven person.. Well, i really need to learn to see things in gods eyes and not in my non-Christian friends eyes..


" They that trust in the Lord shall be as Mount Zion, which cannot be removed, but abideth for ever"Psalm 125:1 (KJV)

AMEN!! But yeah, i cannot say that i was and am really putting all my faith in God yet.. But i am trying and hopefully, i will be as spiritually mature and strong as some of you Crusader's in the future.. Do pray for me guys!!

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|3:44 PM|

Thursday, November 17, 2005

End Time Warnings..

What Does the Bible Say About End Time Warnings?

By Betty Miller


We are hearing warnings from all sectors of our society. There are health warnings, terrorist warnings, economic warnings, weather warnings, and end-of-the-world warnings. Some warnings are valid, others are simply the fears of certain people, and have no basis of accuracy. Governments issue warnings when they feel they are being threatened by invasion or aggression from other powers. Health agencies warn of contagious diseases that could be spread unless precautions are taken. We hear of economic warnings when certain indicators in the markets warrant caution. And of course, our weather agencies monitor the threat of storms, fires, earthquakes, hurricanes and other weather related dangers.
I want to address a particular kind of warning in this article, what is popularly known as an "end time" warning. These voices range from "end-of-the-world" scenarios to end time prophecies depicting all kinds of foreboding happenings that could threaten our world. Some of these warnings are valid and credible, while others are just people who want to be seen and heard. Most of these warnings are coming from the church. However, secular movies and videos have also been depicting "end time" themes with warnings that the end of the world could be near.
Should we heed these warnings? How do we know they are credible? The Bible tells us in 1 Thessalonians 5:21: "Prove all things; hold fast that which is good." We are not supposed to believe every warning we hear, but rather we are to "prove all things." How do we do this? First, we must check out spiritual warnings to see if they are Bible-based. The next thing we need to do is ask the Lord if the motives of the ones who are sounding the warnings are pure, and directed out of concern for the people. Some people prey on people's fears to sell them something, while others like the attention they receive because of their inflated egos.
Bible Warnings
The Bible records many warnings throughout its pages. Those who heeded true warnings from God were spared the predicted consequences. Before we look at some of these, let us look at the primary dictionary definition of the word "warn": to tell (a person) of a danger, coming evil, misfortune, etc.; put on guard, caution.
Throughout the history of the world, God has always made known to his people impending times of trouble, and given them time to prepare (or escape):
He warned Noah and his family of the coming flood and directed them how to prepare to survive it.
Hebrews 11:7: "By faith Noah, being warned of God of things not seen as yet, moved with fear, prepared an ark to the saving of his house; by the which he condemned the world, and became heir of the righteousness which is by faith."He warned Lot and his family of the coming destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah and told them to flee.
Genesis 19:14: "And Lot went out, and spake unto his sons in law, which married his daughters, and said, Up, get you out of this place; for the LORD will destroy this city. But he seemed as one that mocked unto his sons in law."
He warned the Pharaoh of Egypt, through Joseph, of the coming famine and used Joseph to prepare stores of grain during the seven years of plenty, which saved Egypt and Joseph's family when a seven year famine followed the times of plenty.
Genesis 41:30-31: "And there shall arise after them seven years of famine; and all the plenty shall be forgotten in the land of Egypt; and the famine shall consume the land; And the plenty shall not be known in the land by reason of that famine following; for it shall be very grievous."
He warned the Israelites living under Egyptian slavery that the "angel of death" would kill all the first-born of every family and that they must protect themselves and their families by placing the blood of a lamb over the door posts, so the angel would "pass over" them.
Exodus 12:23: "For the LORD will pass through to smite the Egyptians; and when he seeth the blood upon the lintel, and on the two side posts, the LORD will pass over the door, and will not suffer the destroyer to come in unto your houses to smite you."
He warned the wicked people of Ninevah, the capital city of Assyria, of God's coming destruction through Jonah. When they repented, the judgment was averted and did not come for a number of years.
Jonah 3:4-5: "And Jonah began to enter into the city a day's journey, and he cried, and said, Yet forty days, and Nineveh shall be overthrown. So the people of Nineveh believed God, and proclaimed a fast, and put on sackcloth, from the greatest of them even to the least of them.
The Y2K Warnings
Some of the past Y2K warnings could be comparable to the warnings given Ninevah. Warnings were coming from the government, from the technology field and also from church leaders. Most of the warnings stressed that unless the problems were corrected before January 1, 2000, we could face major breakdowns in all spheres of our society. We were warned that we should believe for the best, but prepare for the worst. Although many of the warnings were extreme, they did accomplish one major purpose -- they ignited the leaders of the world to begin doing something about the problem. Because the church prayed and the warnings were heeded, the Y2K disaster was averted.
Now the question arises, "What about all those preparations that took our time, energy and money?" Were they in vain? I don't think the people living in the Southeastern part of the USA thought so. Right after the first of the year, one of the worst ice storms to hit the South occurred, resulting in broken electric lines that took weeks to repair in some areas. If those people prepared for the Y2K disaster they had an alternate source of light, heat, and food reserves until things were restored to normal. Although their preparations were not used for Y2K, this disaster was faced more comfortably because they had made emergency preparations.
What about those people who still have their supplies? Should they give them away or keep them? The answer to this question is that you must hear what the Lord is telling you to do. Wisdom dictates that having some emergency supplies is just a prudent thing to do. However, if you have large stores of food, you should ask the Lord if He has need of it, to give to others now, or if you are to keep it for some future need. Because the Bible refers to the "last days" as a time when great tribulation will precede the return of Christ, it would be wisdom to make some sort of physical preparations. However, the greatest preparation that we all need to make is spiritual preparation. The true prophets of God are still warning of troublous and perilous times coming to this earth that will include persecution of the saints.
Throughout the church history, a period of almost 2000 years, the Lord has given advanced warnings of the coming persecutions to His followers, so that they might flee, prepare for the trials spiritually or physically, or go underground. In almost every one of those situations, it was primarily the God-fearing remnant who had the discernment to understand the times, to see the destruction or suffering that was coming, and to prepare (physically and spiritually). The Lord has always warned and prepared His people for coming catastrophes, danger, upheaval, persecution or suffering.
One common denominator is, that in almost all of those times of trouble down through the ages, the great majority of people could not see the judgments coming. They refused to believe it anything could happen to them. They were enjoying the good life (eating, drinking and partying) right up until the disaster overtook them.
As Jesus said regarding the people of Noah's day in Matthew 24:38, 39: "For as in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage up to the day Noah entered the Ark; and they knew nothing about what would happen until the flood came and took them all away."
A Word From the Lord
Recently the Lord awakened me in the early morning with a word to warn His people to prepare for the judgements that are just ahead. He spoke to my heart that the most important preparation was spiritual preparation. He said that He was continuing to use his prophets and preachers to warn people of the coming troubles, but most of their warnings were general warnings. He also said that He would give individual warnings of what to do, and when to do it, to all that were totally committed to His will, and that they would be protected in the coming days. Those who are committed and obedient to God will hear specific instructions, not only pertaining to their safety, but will be given assignments from the Lord with His empowerment to perform them. These assignments will be His plans for sharing the gospel with the world. He is going to use a company of believers that will do mighty exploits in this hour. If you desire to be among these overcomers you must begin your spiritual preparation now, before it is too late. The devil is deceiving and destroying people daily but the Lord desires for us to overcome him.
Daniel 11:32: "And such as do wickedly against the covenant shall he corrupt by flatteries: but the people that do know their God shall be strong, and do exploits.
2 Timothy 1:7: "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."
Spiritual Preparation
Pray: Spend time daily in prayer seeking God as to what you are to do personally in the way of physical preparation. This could be in areas of moving to a different locale or simply storing some extra food and emergency supplies. If you have no money to make preparation, ask the Lord in faith to supply for you. He will make a way when there is no way! Pray daily with your family and attend the prayer meetings at your church. (If your church does not have prayer meetings you should consider seeking another church or talking to your pastor about establishing one). Jesus said in Luke 19:46: "Saying unto them, It is written, My house is the house of prayer: but ye have made it a den of thieves."
Study the Bible: Turn off the T.V. and spend time studying the Word of God. Christ Unlimited has Bible studies available to help you grow in God. A systematic study of the Word will equip you with the knowledge you need so that you can overcome the destruction facing us in the days ahead and to be able to hear the voice of God. Hosea 4:6 says, "My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge." The Lord will reveal many things that you need to know about how to overcome. You can gain direction for your life, principles to live by, and most of all, you will strengthen your faith in God. We will all need faith to be able to prevail and help others in the future. Romans 10:17, "So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God."
Assemble with like Believers: As believers we need each other. There is strength and protection as we stand together in unity. Strong relationships will be important in the days ahead as we will need to help each other. The Bible also tells us we should be submitted to church leadership as God equips His five fold ministry to lead the church. Hebrews 10:25, "Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching."
Reach out with the Gospel: As Christians we have been commissioned to take the good news of the gospel to the whole world. We must reach out to our family, friends, neighbors and others that have not heard and or need to be reminded of our Lord's message to the lost and backslidden. We must share the gospel with those who will be seeking answers as troubles multiply in the world. Mark 16:15: "And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature. He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned."
Readjust Your Priorities: Seek God first and His righteousness. Place the importance on the above things, plus work on establishing good relationships with your family, friends, work mates and neighbors. Cut out worldly entertainment. It will take both spiritual and physical readjustments if we are to be ready for the tribulation, persecution and other judgements that the whole world faces at this time. These times are predicted to happened just prior to the coming of the Lord.
Matthew 24:42-51: "Watch therefore: for ye know not what hour your Lord doth come.43 But know this, that if the goodman of the house had known in what watch the thief would come, he would have watched, and would not have suffered his house to be broken up.44 Therefore be ye also ready: for in such an hour as ye think not the Son of man cometh.45 Who then is a faithful and wise servant, whom his lord hath made ruler over his household, to give them meat in due season?46 Blessed is that servant, whom his lord when he cometh shall find so doing.47 Verily I say unto you, That he shall make him ruler over all his goods.48 But and if that evil servant shall say in his heart, My lord delayeth his coming;49 And shall begin to smite his fellowservants, and to eat and drink with the drunken;50 The lord of that servant shall come in a day when he looketh not for him, and in an hour that he is not aware of,51 And shall cut him asunder, and appoint him his portion with the hypocrites: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth."
Warnings are given so that we can take action and either prevent, prepare for, or flee the danger or suffering that is sure to come without a change in the course of affairs. Let us heed the warnings of the Bible and God's prophets so we will be able to escape all of these things and stand before our Lord when He comes.
Luke 21:36: "Watch ye therefore, and pray always, that ye may be accounted worthy to escape all these things that shall come to pass, and to stand before the Son of man."

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|10:50 AM|

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Funny t-shirts?

Today we are going to discuss abt crazy t-shirts.. Crazy what ah?? Those t-shirts that have designs that really make u want to laugh once u look at them lah!

Ok here are the updates on thecraziest t-shirts in town..

1. I can rise to the top.. But whose going to take care of you at the bottom?


2. If you are close enough to read this, i can easily take you down.. / your'e too close


3. If you are close enough to read this, you've already read it..


4. Boys need Girls..


5. WARNING.. This shirt contains an asshole..


6.

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|11:13 AM|

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Just another day.. feeling sad and down..

Well, today i am abt to share what really happened when i was in sec sch.. the tribulations that i faced.. and the ppl who left me to die.. To those who are trying their best to help me though my current trial, i hope that after reading my posting, u will understand what i am going through and just how deep my wounds are.. They may never heal.. (Please take note that i am not backslidding.. I'm just very confused and lost over why many non-christians act the way they do..)

In Ecclesiastes 4:10 (New International Version) it says.. 10 If one falls down, his friend can help him up.But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!

In Ecclesiastes 4:10 (New Living Translation) it says.. 10 If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But people who are alone when they fall are in real trouble.

In Ecclesiastes 4:10 (King James Version) it says.. 10 For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.



What am i trying to show you through this verse in so many different bible versions? It represents my past backslidding life in so many ways.. Now.. whenever i try telling ppl abt my past, some christians will say to me.. Don't bring up the past.. Its over.. Its time to live for the present and start doing something abt your life.. Some however, will try to listen and understand what happened.. and maybe give their testimonies etc.. Thats why i find it so hard to share to my christian friends because of the mixed views they give... Like when i share to them abt why my dislike for this person bcoz of certain bad traits, some others may say.. yes i also feel the same way.. and they will criticise.. others will say they are unaware of his bad traits.. Some of my more extreme christian friends will say.. Forgive and forget.. Do not judge anybody.. Jesus learnt to forgive and forget even those who crucified him.. You should follow his example.. And also that no one can judge a person except god.. So yeah, different views.. But, i am not saying that any of their views are wrong..


Ok, when i was in sec 3, i tried reaching out to this guy from another class .. Well, he was the most unpopular guy in the entire sec 4 and well, his name was infamous.. He had a reputation for irritating others with his behaviours a lot.. and he was also labeled by others as being a HUGE nerd.. yeah, in class he woud keep raising his hands whenever the teacher asked he class questions and he would be sibei wu liao.. ask so many questions that are out of the textbk syllabus.. Like eg: in physics lesson he would ask abt what hard water soft water.. WHAT ARE THOSE THINGS?!?! Oh my gosh!! And just to prove that he was brainy?? And he was HUGE attention seeker... Always doinga lot of stupid things.. like when all the sec 4's had study week in exam hall before o lvls, he just purposely fall off his chair just so that ppl will notice him and laugh at him.. Oh man.. He's got issues.. He is also always reading those intellectual books.. And i think the one person he looks up to is isaac newton??? Oh my goodness.. He keeps filling himself with all those science crap.. Also infamous for boasting that he can skip his o lvls and immediately go cambridge to study.. Yeah right.. He just keeps lying so that other ppl will pay attention to him.. A typical attention seeker.. =.=" Well, yeah, i tried reaching out to him because i felt very sorry for him.. I wanted to share christ with him so that he might recieve christ and at least know god's plan and purpose for him.. But, he was sibei anti-christ.. No.. not those black-metal rocker kind of anti christ.. The scientific kind of anti-christ.. Well, he bombed me with all kinds of science debates christianity scenarios.. During that time, i was using my own strength to reach out ot him and not using god to help me.. But i did pray for him.. And, that guy kept abusing my "friendship" He had his own schedule even though i was really willing to take time off to talk to him.. And yeah, he became really freaky by treating me like his best friend.. Even though i had known him for only a few months.. Crap... Well, soon.. my entire class started distancing from me.. A few gangsters in my class even started bullying me and saying what "FUCK U CHRISTIAN" Hey, even when i see one of them in poly, He still says "Hey Bing Hao! U a christian right? FUCK YOU!" But yeah, i spat at his legs once..

U see, the worst thing of being bullied in class was that a few of my friends in class didn't come to help me.. Even those so called christians in class didn't even stand up for me.. Let alone christianity.. Its like they had just rejected god in those moments in class.. I am really ashamed of them.. And wll, afer receving so much dicrimination.. I finally chrashed and burned.. Having failed to rreach out to that guy after so long, i just gave up.. I could not answer his questions and i was stupid not to ask my church for help.. And yah, i started to backslide all because i could not solve those questions.. I also started to conform to my class by hanging out more with my class and ignoring that guy vcompletely.. I even joined others in mocking him.. Everytime i saw him in sch, i just avoided him.. Hey, he called me a coward.. But, hey, friendship is conditional.. I can choose to be his friend or not.. And it was his fault for not treasuring our friendship.. So yeah, i was starting to get accepted by my class again.. But, i would never forget what so many of them did to me before.. The rejection had left a HUGE scar within me...

Gradualy, i stopped going to church.. One reason was that during the end of sec 3, i was supposed ot go for my 2nd mission trip to thailand.. I went for my first in sec 2.. Thailand also. But on the day of the flight, my parents found my report book and well, they discovered that my results were horrifying.. Almost my subjects F9 siah.. So , they pulled me out of the trip a few hours before the flight took off.. And yeah, i stopped returning to church cause i felt my mission trip group would not forgive me for leaving the trip last min.. Bcoz, was supposed to record the events that happened in my group and put it in a newsletter.. And yeah, in my mission trip group, it consisted of ppl from my sec sch.. All BB and GB members.. The BB members in my team were my juniors.. But i always felt that they did not respect me as a senior during my time in the BB.. Up till today, in church, i still feel that they do not respect me.. Hey i may be thinking too much but this is exactly how i feel.. This is my blog u know?? Well, when i topped going to church for so long, my my cell group did not contact me to find out how i was doing.. Its ironic cause my former cellgrp name was philadelphia.. the greek word for brotherly love.. And yeah, though i had great times in that cell grp, i just don't think i felt any brotherly love as i was backslidding.. The cell goup leader didn't even contact me at all.. Wasn't that he's duty?? Ok i cannot judge anybody but i still feel VERY STRONGLY that a cellgrp leader has responsibilities over his cellgrp.. And yeah, when i tried returning to my church youth service (satuday night life) at times, i had nobody to sit with.. My cellgroup?? I think that they had forgotten abt me coz during one day when i came back to snl i tired to approach them during the worship.. Well, i dun tink any of them remembered me..Actually, i tink that my cell grps age difference is too much.. At one end of my former cellgrp, we had poly student ready to graduate.. the other end consisted of ppl from priamry 5 and 6?? The maturity level was so different and its ahrd to coordinate activites and even talk abt god's word during fellwship cause we may think at different maturity levels.. When it was itme for pastor mark to talk, i sat way back of the hall because i could not sit with my vell grp.. There was no one beside me and i dun tink any of the churhc members even communcated with me that day.. Finally in hte middle of the session, i gave up and just left.. When i went into the toilet, one of my former cell grp members, a very young primary 6 boy.. At that time lah.. He said i was very vain cause i was still trying to use a comb to restyle my waxed hair.. Wah lau.. I tink he forget who i was that day .. But i was like.. How can u anyhow comment on others.. Mind your own business lah!! And then, i just left the church building.. I also went back to church a few times in january.. Ok i was trying to invite some of my friends to my church.. That was the only reason why i wentback.. Mostly, on sundya services, i would just sit in and just listen.. Well, i was asked to fill in this form for the church.. Had to wroite down my contact details.. (which i did) A few days later, this cell group leader called Aaron rang.. He sounded nice and well, i arranged to meet him in person alone.. But, he came with his entire Cell Group and yeah, thta really turned me off.. But yeah, he's Cell Group is mature and i would have considered joining if i really wanted to settle down in a Cell Group..

Then came FOP.. I saw 2 members of my former cell grp queing up at the indoor stadium for the FOP.. but pls take note that i was with the crusade and so i didn't really care.. Ialso saw sylvesterscell grp dere.. Recognised him bcoz i helped him raise funds through his game stall b4 my first mission trip.. Also, the church t-shirt that he wore was quite obvious.. And i had seen he's cell grp members before.. Well, i still see that church t-shirt worn by some girls in bkt batok.. But, i dun think i will ever know who those church ppl really are.. And yeah, its not uncommon coz my sch has a lot of Cosbt ppl.. (Thinks of the 53rd BB company and the 10th GB company in bbss as prove..)

U see, if i had been in a smaller church, the youth group could have been more close to each other because they are small in size.. (I am not saying that i am 100% correct!!) Also, if i wasn't in church for quite a while, they would try to contact me..And yeah, my absence in church would have been more noticeable..Please note that i am not saying a small church is better or not as good.. I am just saying that the church's organisation would have been more manageable.. Who cares if u boast that you come from a big church like City Harvest and then don't grow inside it.. A church is really just a place where u can grow spiritually in Christ.. Just like any other cellgroup..

Ok, when the Da-Vinci code was published and first put on the shelves, i immediately bought it and read it within 3 days.. Well, that book was some bad shit.. I read it and i backslidded.. When my christian friends invited me to their churches (at that time during the sec sch - poly LONG holidays, i was churchless), i would visit just to bomb their church members questions on christ backed with "evidence" from the Da-Vinci Code... At that time, i just asked questions not to grow in christ, but to prove that Christianity was a religion that was tainted by the world church.. That means, i thought the "real" Christianty was lost forever.. I wanted to prove jesus wasn't god but a man using help from god to do the things he did, i wanted to prove that the Bible was biased.. At that time, i said it was 100% correct, but it only showed a one sided view abt Jesus Christ's life.. and i also had this huge evidence at that time.. The Bible only contained books written my men and not women, even though ppl like jesus "mother" mary and mary maglenade wrote books too.. Those books were burnt by the Christian Church and the only remaining pieces are the Dead Sea Scrolls... So in short, i was trying to destroy the foundations of Christianity..

I'm not sure if you all have noticed.. but i used to blog in a very fun way.. But now, it seems that i just don't enjoy doing that anymore.. Haixx.. No related to my current topic.. But just to keep the readers in touch..

Note to all Christians: Take the advice of a former backslidder and please do not read the Da-Vinci Code if you feel that u are not spiritually strong.. For the outcome can be quite scary... Have basic da-Vinci Code Training first..


Well, today i wasn't confused.. but i was wondering.. if the answers to all of life's perplexing questions and also the answrs to how we should lead our lives are already known.. then why issit that so many christians still face so many difficulties.. Is it because their faith is not strong? No.. coz we are all human and we all have our up's and down's.. If a person was completely grown as a christian, he would have been like Jesus, completely free of sin..

Hmm.. had that talk finally today.. Didn't expect it to turn out that way cause this crusader from the nyp campus crusade told me that the "talk" would only happen if things really turned out for the worst.. yeah, coz when i shared with crusaders in Sp, they cleared all my bad thoughts and even told me not to keep that person in the dark about how i felt.. And yeah they said that the more i kept that person in the dark, the more i was backstabbing that person.. So yeah, i knew that i needed to forgive him and during one time i told that person how i felt.. But at that time, i had already forgiven that person.. But, not sure how people thought that things had gone for the worst cause i was already pretty much OK with everything liao.. Haixx.. no matter.. i still need to change in lots of ways.. I am not perfect and so i should not judge others.. But to that person.. I really know that you are busy and its ok with me.. I have already begun asked myself to pursue god on my own first.. So yeah, i'm really sorry that things had turned out the way it is now.. I did not expect it because i had already forgiven..


Right now, i'm facing 2 things that are opposing my spiritual growth.. Also i feel that it might be 2 of the main things affecting Christians worldwide now in their walk with God..

One is learning how to Forgive and Forget.. Hey i had a terrible past behind of me.. And yeah, i found it hard at times to Forgive and Forget.. But yeah, to all those who offended me last time, i forgive you..

Also, another thing that i found hard to do was to stop judging others.. It was more like a habit but i will pray hard that i will stop judging others.. Hey, don't think that just because i am weak in this 2 points means i am a bad christian or anything.. I am still trying hard to grow.. And, pls take note that my growth rate may or may not be the same as other Christians..

In fact, many ppl have found me to be a ppl-centered person. This i am not hiding from all of you.. In fact, i am very scared of rejection (Read my last posting..) and i am scared of what others think of me.. This is bad man..

Also, i tensd to rely to much on ppl by pushing every of my woes to others to pray for.. Yeah, i do pray for it, but i should not keep having that tendency to share with too many ppl because they may not be close to me and they would not know EXACTLY what i am facing now.. Well, my dgl shared with me abt 3 levels of prayer.. One is the general prayer..
Basically its Praying for others.. The other is your normal prayer abt your life with god.. Which is more powerful because you know best what happens in your life and yeah, u tend to pray on more sensitive things that u may not want to share with others.. The lst is the impossible prayer.. Praying for things that may seem impossible in man's eyes.. Like example, seeing the entire Sp campus saved..

Well, my dgl also gaave me some impt prayer pointers i shld take note.. He also asked me to persevere in praying for things.. Because, God will do either of 3 things when u pray.. God will either answer it, Reject it or ask you to wait till the time is ripe for the prayer to be successful..

I am blogging them down so that one day, when i go through my archive page, i will think back at how i am progressing with my prayer pointers.. Ok here are the prayer pointers.. But, some of my responses to these prayer pointers are personal and so, i won't be blogging them down..

---> What are the struggles you have?

Ans: 1. dg 2. School 3. Sec Sch Classmates 4. Poly Classmates 5. Parents 6. Church Mates 7. Crusaders 8. Non-christian thinkings

---> What/Who are the things or people you have not forgiven yet?

Ans: 1. Sec Sch Classmates 2. Parents 3. Church Mates 4. dg

---> How and what do you think you can change yourself?

Ans: 1. Behaviour 2. Attitude 3. Personality 4. Learning to forgive and forget 5. Learning not to judge others

---> Where and when do you think you should start at?

Ans: 1. I should really start right now 2. I should start being more friendlyand approchable to others.. 3. I really should learn to forgive and forget 4. I should never judge others

---> What do you think your dgl can help you?

Ans: 1. Should really understand me more 2. Maybe some quiet time together? =) 3. Bond together more as a dg 4. Show care and concern =)



--to be continued--

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|12:07 PM|

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Feeling so disillusioned..

The big question . Just what are we living our lives for?

I'm now feeling very down and out lately.. Everyday when i come to sch this sem i am always looking very shag.. I tink its bocz i am too involved in the Campus Crusade bah? Haixx.. Looking so worn and tired everyday after sch.. Come back home, i juz feel like dumping myself on my bed andgoing to sleep.. I'm getting more and more disillusioned everyday also.. It feels like i'm self inflicting pain to myself.. In sch, i may seem pretty ok, but deep down inside of me, i am really confused and lost.. i've tried to tackle too many things so far.. Trying to push myself to the limits in almost everything.. So much so that i have neglected many basic things in my life.. Things that i have neglected for far too long.. And, now i live to regret it.. ='(

Lately, i am starting to share the gospel to my friends.. But, i just cannot get through to them and each time i try sharing, i feel physicall very drained.. I just felt confused over how to share with them the gospel the next time aroundand even though i know that prayer can move mountains, i still felt rather lost.. Lately, one of my Campus Crusade seniors shared about how much u believe will add up to how much you will receive through prayer.. But, right now, i dun even have a clear picture of what i really want to receive.. I just want to stop pushing myself to my last breath and just try to keep everything stable.. Father pls help me.. Won't you show me your mercy and grace and help me through this difficult time that i am undergoing now.. I dun wish to fall again..

Nowadays, wherever i go, i will always see this depression advertisements posted in every corner.. They say what.. Depressed? Suicidal?? And ask those ppl to contact which organisation for counselling.. U know ah, everytime i see those advertisements, i am so tempted to take out a big black marker and write on it.. "U NEED GOD!!" And then horx, lately i also saw this banners advertiseing for one book titled "What are we living our life for?"

When i first saw the advertisement , i thought that it was another one of those physcology or counselling bullshit.. Then this answer to the book question came into my mind.. We are livng our lives as children of god, filled with the holy spirit.. ok , i shall not go on any further.. But as my eyes scrolled down the advertisement, it revealed the name of a christian organisation.. And then i was like chey, must be lah..

So, recently, i have seen that book in the popular book shelves.. My Sp popular bookstore was not spared either.. Well, i saw that lone book on the shelves of the Sp popular bookstore.. Hey, its still better then them selling a Da Vinci Code Book there.. Its a fu_king book that can really brainwash the young christians mind.. Eg: Me!! Luckily, my Campus Crusade has training this sem for that Book to prepare us for the upcoming Da Vinci Code Movie which will be released early next year.. The Crusade is so good!! As i took the "What are we living our lives for" book of its shelf, i turned to the back trying to find something that would identify the book as uniquely christian, and the words "Zondervan Publishing" proved it so..


The next day...

When u enter my blog, u see 3 pop up messages.. Well, i am really what those messages are saying.. Confused and Lost..Hiding in the shadows.. Never turning back.. I had wounds before in sec sch.. This wounds left me with scars deep inside of me.. They also left me with so many phobias that i try to cover up everyday.. But, i am actually running away from reality.. Now, those phobias are returning and lately it just seems as though i can break down and cry.. I tried sharing with some of the crusaders about how those phobias were returning to haunt me.. Well, they tried to help me.. They told me to put my faith in god and trust that he will help me overcome this obstacle in my life abnd not let the devil triumph.. What they said made me reflect abt my life a bit.. But, it seemed as though i could burst into tears in front of them.. I just didn't know how to tell them.. It was almost as if none of them could truly understand what i had been through.. What i had experienced before.. All the painful memories that i tried to forgive and forget.. That i tried not to judge others.. But, what am i but one guy against the entire world.. Its really hard not to conform to the world.. To follow the majority or be left out..

--to be continued--

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|10:55 PM|

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Ok, i am getting tired of blogging.. again..

Ok, i am getting tired of blogging.. again..

Haixx.. yah lorx.. wad to do.. I am now blogging at 2.20 am on Sunday.. Really feel sibei sian surfing the net so i just forced myself to start blogging again.. Well, hmm.. since i last posted in my blog till now.. not much has really happened.. (Just that i had my holidays fully booked with crusade activities and i really am trying to grow like mad spiritually) Just think of that baby powder 'Grow' advertisement.. where the children all sang "Grow!! Grow!! Grow!! We Love Grow!!" Haha.. Well, yeah, i feel much stronger as a christian then i was 2 yrs ago.. (that was like the time i started backslidding??) Freefall crash and burn.. no thanks to that Da Vnci code book written by Dan Brown which i meediately bought when it appeared in the bookshop shelves and , no thanks also to my former church cellgrp members who didn't realise i was MIA inchurch and didn't help pull me back to christ.. (Even though some of them had my contacts??) -.-" Now, i really dun believe in what ppl say about being rooted in a Cellgrp so that the cell grp can help u while u are backslidding.. Coz, i feel that its all crap.. i mean, u dun expect a backslidding christian to call the cellgrp leader one dya ad then say.. "Look.. i am backslidding, help me" In real life where got such thing happen one?!?! The backslidder will most probably not notice where he has gone weong and continue to have his self-directed life.. all the way till the day he dies.. And, is it he's fault that he was backslidding?? That i am not sure, but i know that nobody helped the backslidder till he died.. Well, it wasn't because of my church that i returned to christ.. rather, it was the emptiness i felt while backslidding that made me want to return to christ.. But, i felt rather paiseh to return to church before i joined the Campus Crusade in Singapore Polytechnic.. Because, i my parent backed me out of the 2003 mission trip to thailand and i just felt that my mission trip team members would nvr forgive me.. Now i know that even if they are unwilling to forgive me, God will still forgive me.. And yeah, that was one of the reasons why i felt afraid to retuen to church.. Another major reason wa sbaecause when i sneaked back to church at times, i just didn't feel welcome by my cellgroup.. Uusually during youth service, i would seat with my cellgrp.. But when i returned, i found myself seating right at the back?? Oh my gosh?!?! And hey, to all those ppl who feel that the cmapus crusade for christ is bad, i would beg to differ.. Really, i am so ecouraged by the crusaders in Sp that i have challenged myself to take quiet times and prayers and even reach out to the lost frequently.. Well, b4 i joined the crusade, ,my defintition of reaching to the lost was during certain planned events, and not by ur own free will.. I now know that i was wrong.. And , the crusade teachings are not affected by the different denominations of churches that the crusaders come from.. I fyou were to say that the crusaders might be influenced by other chruches cultures and bible teachings, then i would say they are not strong in their faith at all.. Also, i feel that the crusade is quite general in its teachings.. Also, it unites all christians in tetiary institutions as one STRONG BODY IN CHRIST.. please take note that we are not seperated because of our diff church cultures.. We as christians are all children of god.. I fact, if u were attempting to reach out to the lost in campus, the best way to do so is well.. u guessed it.. The campus crusade for Christ.. Find one and join it at a Campus near you.. =) Well, the crusade unites all the campuses christians as one body of christ, so u dun need to go abt searchnig for other christians in ur campus.. Anyways, the crusade is really very encouraging when u take that bold step to share the gospel to the students at your campus.. In some cases, the crusade has also helped each other to reach to their fellow classmates and friends.. Talk abt unity man!!

Ok, well, lately i have been improving on my shield of faith.. I have returned to church as of early last month.. Hmm.. now when i go to church, i dun really feel like mingling with all the church members anymore.. Rather, everytime i step into the church for service, i will try to picture myself alone in the room.. No Singer, No drummer, No guitarist, No church members.. Just me alone in the room having my own quiet time with God, singing songs of worship and praise to him.. But, this makes me think.. Do those oyund christians out there in church sing songs of worship because everybody is doing so or do they really mean it?? 2 yrs ago, when i was in churhc, i didn't mean what i sang.. U know, i went to church 2 years ago for the wrong reasons.. I went there only because i could make friends and basically just hang and relax from stress.. Now, i know this sounds stupid and crazy but yeah, thats what i thought.. And, i'm very sure that many many young christians in my church also go to church for that reason.. Thats why, now i've realised that it is wrong...(But, how to search out those ppl who go to church cause of misguided reasons?? Its like so h ard to change their mindsets!!) Well, to prove that i really was in church for the wrong reasons, let me tell u that i was nvr growing my my church back then!! Sure, its easy to say that u love god and that u want to spread the gospel and that u are holy.. But , just how many of us atually mean what we say.. God is watching over u every second ok!! The judge i sjust standing at the door.. So, if u feel that u are misguided, i would suggest apersonal retreat for u to find god again.. Interesting fact abt me: (I always thought that only muslims fast until i joined the crusade.. Then i realised that christians also fasted!!) Well, see!! There was like so much i didn't know about the true meaning of being a Christian till i joined the Crusade.. Last week when i asked my younger brother (sec 1 this yr) if he was a Christian, he gave me a hesitant "Yes." Well, when i asked him again what made him a Christian, he gave another hesitant"Er.. Because i was Baptized?" So i told him that that was wrong thinking.. (Well, that was what one of my Crusade seniors asked me last semester and shockingly, i could give him no ans.. Hmm.. now i know the answer after growing in christ.. But, i really do challenge all Christians out there to ask young believers why they consider themselves Christians.. You ma ybe surprised by what u hear..) There are Christians out there who just want to know who God and Jesus Christ is and just believe in their existence but dun follow what God commanded them to do in the Bible..mThey u will still be judged.. Not by me.. for no man is fit to judge naother, but by jesus christ.. Dun think that u can anyhow call yourself a Christian but continue to lead unholy lives.. I am not blaming my brother for what he has said to me for he is totally misguided by my backslidding parents.. Look here, my brother has never gone for church service in his entire life!! And my parent sjust keep saying that being a christian is to have to holy spirit inside of you and thats it.. . Ok, to continue what i have just said, u may be baptized my water, but are u baptzed in the Holy Spirit?? The one which matters the most I have asked other "Christians" if they were Christians and they told me that they were not baptized in water yet, so they did not feel that they were considered Christians.. Ok, thats really wrong thinking.. Being baptized in the holy spirit is by far the most important thing in a Christians walk.. Well, i asked my brother if he knew what the sinner's prayer was. And well ,he shook his head.. So i explained to him the diff. betwn baptism in water and in the holy spirit.. And i told him that the Sinner's prayer was very very important.. But yeah, he expressed that he wasn't rdy for such complex stuff and told me to wait till the next day, when he was more awake..

Hmm.. these few days have been quite uneventful.. Just that i am in a new class consisting of forward students.. yeah i am a forward student.. But its not always as bad as u tink.. In fact, forward students tend to be more awake ans aware of their studies.. Ok, thats what i feel.. And yeah, i dunno why i am so unlucky.. But everytime i try to take the lift to the ground floor of the Bukit Batok Mrt Station, i'm always the unlucky one who cannot squeeze in?!? Wah lau!! i think its like almost 5 times already when only one of my feet can squeeze into the lift and i always have to give up and take the escalator down?? Also, i feel that i am really changed and my realtionship with God renewed..


-- To be Continued-- Too tired lah!! Now its like 3.00 am?? tml still got church service to attend u know?? =)

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|2:11 AM|

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